Monday, January 30, 2017

You Win Some, You Lose Some, But You Win Some More!!!

It's Monday

Before I arrived at work

Today's wins
- I made it to work "on-time"
- I changed and fed my daughters and showered before I left
- My Lyft driver waited for me
- I bought disposable coffee cups at Target yesterday, so that I can take coffee from home and not spend money in the streets
- I remember to pack my breakfast and lunch. 


Today's losses
- I woke up late, so I had to pump and give the babies a bottle rather than nurse. 
- My nanny was late, which resulted in my Lyft driver having to wait
- I forgot to put on my tank top, which keeps me warm while I'm pumping in the office
- I forgot the electrical plug for my milk pump, so that I can pump milk at work.
- The lunch I packed was spoiled, so I still had to buy lunch.
- I left my cup of hot coffee in my disposable cup on the counter
- I couldn't get my sweater over my head in time after pumping and I was late to a conference call.

After I arrived at work

More wins
- The host is also late AS HELL to this meeting, so no one noticed. 19 minutes late to be exact (enough to let me write this blog.)
- There's another woman who pumps at work and she keeps her pump in the mother's room and so I could use her electrical cord. Shout out to the monopoly that Medela has on breast pumps that made my loss, not so bad.
- This other mother also has a heater in the mother's room, so I didn't freeze my nipples off pumping milk
- While I was out getting lunch, I found a place nearby with vegan cookies AND cupcakes.
- The babies were less fussy after not being woke up before I went to work, so this is like the first step to weaning and it wasn't all emotional like I expected. It kind of just happened. 

Friday, January 27, 2017

Oh, to be Cocky

I think to be a working mom, you have to be just a little bit cocky. To think that you can manage a household, nurture two humans and manage clients and teams at work without dropping the ball (or appearing to drop the ball) on any of those things takes a woman with some unmitigated gall.

Who do I think I am, #OnToday?

Wednesday, January 25, 2017

Valentine's Day

OMG! It's in two weeks. It's going to take me that long to find outfits, gifts and come up with photo shoot ideas. Ooh wee, I'm behind.

Tuesday, January 24, 2017

Scream Free Parenting

I'm listening to a webinar called "Scream Free Parenting." I don't want to be a mean, angry mama. And sometimes I'm a mean, angry person, so it's not like it's going to just stop because I have babies, so this webinar piqued my interest.

Like many things on this blog, this is more for my future reference than your present entertainment. :)

Some key points:

- Being more emotionally separate from our children. They are individuals. We cannot manage their outcomes. We are resources to our kids, but they can manage their own lives (To a point, for example a 5 year old can tie his own shoes, don't do it because you want to do it.)  

- Don't put your anxiety on your kids. Like if you're rushing them out of the door because you don't want to be late. Just let them get themselves together and provide consequences for lateness, but you don't have to get all worked up and scream at them about being on time.

- Don't tie your emotions to their actions. If you tell them to brush their teeth and they don't, and you get all worked up, then they expect to only do things when parents are worked up. Provide sound consequences, but don't lose it. When you lose it, the child gets caught up in your feelings, actions, emotions rather than their own actions or inaction.

- Being Calm Parent is tied to raising self-reliant kids. If you get all worked up, they will expect that level of anxiety to get anything done. Then we're you're not breathing down their backs, they won't perform/deliver. 

Boundaries - she mentioned a GANG of them, but I couldn't type them. Will link the blog post when they post it.

www.debbiepincus.com
Debbie@debbiepincus.com

Thursday, January 12, 2017

All Figured Out...

I figured out a way to excel as a working twin mom. I just need to eliminate eating, sleeping, pumping and personal hygiene from my schedule, then I could do it all... wait.

Friday, January 6, 2017

Yahoo! Finance...

Lord, I was a full day late, but that just means that people had time to gather all of the best memes/Tweets.

S.S. Deadass had me in TEARS!

Thank you internet, thank you.

Thursday, January 5, 2017

Having a Baby is Hard...

I'm saying this because I think people this it's simple. It's so common that I think people who don't have kids or never been in the birthing room or never really had real conversations about it take it lightly.

Mothers could die given birth. Mothers have died giving birth.

AND some moms get sick AFTER having kids. I had two trips to the emergency room and one unplanned doctors visit in the two weeks after having the twins. Not to mention the extra day I had to stay on the labor floor because I had post-baby complications.

Our bodies are wonderful, but not teflon.

I'm just saying this because I'm hoping people without kids can start to be more sensitive about what they say. Janet Jackson is 50. She just had a baby.

All people can talk about is when she is getting back into rehearsal for a concert. Sure Teyana Taylor has bounceback from the GAWDS! And even performed while pregnant, but I think for like 80/90% of moms pregnancy is hard and having a newborn is hard.

And the idea that Janet needs to be in rehearsal is the same idea that has people without kids thinking maternity leave is a vacation.

Our bodies need to recover. We need to bond with (and breastfeed our babies). Pregnancy and motherhood and not to be taken lightly just because they are common.

I hope that you will take what I'm saying to heart and not just call me sensitive or write it off. We have to stop with this super woman rhetoric and let moms be moms first and everything else second.

Sunday, January 1, 2017

Hello 2017!

I am so happy for a new year, new beginnings, new opportunities and fresh starts. I used to sit in church and listen to the preacher on 12/31 talk about how bad the year was and how your next year will be better. And I always thought, this ain't really my sermon. My year was pretty solid.

Well, I'm glad I sat in church all those years storing up those sermons for a year when I needed it. I made it to church twice this year. Two different churches and the babies were with me both times so I didn't really get to focus.

Side note: what is the purpose of taking babies to church? Besides all the nasty people kisisng and touching them, there is no way for young parents to praise God or focus on the Word while trying to get infants to be still and/or quiet. ALSO, infants don't want to be still and/or quiet. I guess if you're less uptight than me, you could drop your kids off in the nursery with all the other [germ-infested] kids and going to church would be like a 2-hour break.

That's something to keep me in mind for my future. I might drop these little buggers off and go home and take a nap. #FreeChildcare. Anyway, I digress.

As I was saying. I'm glad I sat in church all those years and I was able to recall those sermons because that message was for me this year, honey. I'm so happy to see 2017. I feel like my life is going to get easier (are toddlers easier than infants though? Maybe I played myself.)

I wish you so much love and peace and joy and contentment and happiness and prosperity and just calming of the mind in 2017. I wish the same for myself.

HAPPY NEW YEAR!