Tuesday, December 19, 2017

In These Baby Streets

In 2015, I didn't take any days off for Christmas because I was saving up all my days for maternity leave. In 2016, I didn't have any days left because you have to use all of your sick time, personal time and vacation time before your short term disability (maternity leave) kicks in. So from August 1st to December 31st, 2016, I had no days off work... And I was a new mom, nursing twin babies. LAWDT, I was tired.

Oh, but 2017. What a glorious year it has been. I sleep through the night. And I'm finding out that most moms don't actually get 6-8 hours of sleep. Sucks for them. I'm sleeping good and I'm not turning back! Things are getting back to normal, or hell, things are a new normal and they are fine with me.


AND AND, my children are mobile enough that I can take them outside without a partner. I think the first time I did that was at K's baby sprinkle and it was a doozy. They had just started walking and were running around tearing K's house up.

But now, we've been a few places and done a few things. I think we get to a play space and/or a  birthday party about twice a month. Well, next week, we in these streets every day baby! What I'm not gone do is be in the house with two toddlers for 10 straight days. Nah, they're about to get to know the ins and outs of the city and suburbs.

I invited most of my mom friends (I know I forgot somebody). Please forgive me if you are one of the forgotten. But it's lowkey, come if you're free. Not a birthday party. Not a big deal.

Plus, they have outfits! Ooh, do they have outfits. Christmas Eve, Christmas, Regular church day, New Year's Eve and New Year's Day outfits. Athleisure and bathleisure outfits. Park, playtime, nighttime and bedtime OUT FITS!

Oh boy, this part of mom-ming is fun. I'm ready!

Monday, December 11, 2017

Ah, the Domestic Life

I'm a mom. I've fully leaned into that. It fits me like a glove. What I was not prepared for is how domestic I have to be in order to do mom stuff well. Ugh. I just hate the cooking and the cleaning and the grocery shopping. Nesting is cool because it requires consumption and I'ont mind cosmetic shopping. But since my body decided to give me two babies at the same damn time, I don't really have the funds I thought I would to hire people to do all of the things I don't want to do. I have to clip my own cartwheel coupons dawg. It doesn't suit me.

Anywho, while I was washing dishes Sunday night, I decided a on few more repairs I want to get done to the home. Since moving in with my mom, you'd think I actually owned a home with all the repairs I am doing. If we're being honest, I really just want a big condo or to rent somebody else's house. I want to focus on living life and let someone else do the house management.

Alas, if this was Downton Abbey I would live downstairs and not upstairs, so here I am. Eating the servant's meal (whatever Lahna & Joy leaves on their plate) and managing a household.

I decide I'm going to get two things done to the bathroom. Not a full remodel, just two things that will make the time we spend in this room go better. I have the plumber coming Tuesday. I have the contractor on standby for when the plumber gets finished. I could potentially have these two things that I've been wanting to do forever, done by the end of the year (or even before Christmas). I'm geeked up about it.

Sunday afternoon, the dryer breaks. I have a lot of clothes, but I don't wear a lot of clothes. I wear the same five things in rotation and four of them are loungy pants because I work from home most days.

LAWDT, my one load of all of my favorite things are wet and funky in the dryer and now I have to shift funds from the bathroom repairs to the dryer. OR, I just have to pay for both, which is also the likely thing. I don't want to adult.

Do you own your home? What are the most annoying repairs you've had to do recently? Are you a hands-on handyman or do you hire out like me? Do you prefer new construction or fixer uppers?

Monday, November 27, 2017

A Lovely Day!

Thanksgiving was a lovely day this year. You all know I am the ultimate planner. I like things to be planned to the tee. But then, you also know I'm a twin mom and you can't be QUITE so buttoned up when toddlers are involved. Things went swimmingly well this year and here are a few reasons why.

1. I remembered that Thanksgiving was coming when I did my Sunday grocery shopping (the day before Thanksgiving) and didn't buy THAT much food. So when we got a turkey and a ham and all the fix-ins, there was space for it in the fridge and the freezer. It also gave me a great opportunity to get all of the fluff out of the fridge and freezer. That's who I am now, a woman who gets excited about defrosting.

2. My mom did the actual Thanksgiving shopping, which was such a relief.

3. My family does a bit of a potluck, so everyone only has to make 1 or 2 dishes. How nice is that?

4. I didn't PLAN to go to my mom's church (which is across the street from our house), but I said if we were up early enough, and dressed and ready, then we would. My mom left us at 9:30 a.m. and I headed out at about 10 a.m. on foot, but we made it. Thanksgiving service is only an hour long and my loves did great. They drank water, played with their toys, screamed for their grandma (who is an usher) during offering and overall just spent time being cute, which is their one true job at this age. No one offered me any unsolicited advice, and there were no toddler meltdowns. Even better, church ended at 11, which is their usual naptime. They were in the bed by 11:30 a.m.

5. I had uninterrupted time to cook the mac & cheese. Y'all know that's the one dish I put my foot it. I'd go up against your grandma and win. I ain't playin. Anywho, I took my time with it

6. I got along with the twins' father all day. If ever there's something to be grateful for, that's it.

7. My babies only ate one thing on Thanksgiving: MY MAC AND CHEESE! Talk about that for an ego boost. *shimmies* *bodyrolls* *pop locks* *footworks* These little sweet girls used to be terrors, but lately they are amazing little reminders of how dope I am... times two!

8. We ate on time. In a black household. And my mom had to work, so folks were gone by 5. We had family nap time from 4-6. HOLLA!

9. I did not cry when we went around to say what we are thankful for. I almost ALWAYS cry. I'm such a sapp. I went first, made a little joke and kept the party going.

10. Last year, I was in New York, unwilling (the stress) and unable (the cost) to travel with 6 month old twins, but this year, I was home with family. And outside of getting the carpets clean, scrubbing down the bathroom and making some fye mac, the day didn't really cost me any time or effort.

Monday, November 20, 2017

35 down, 15 to go!

I cannot believe I haven't been to a new state since 2013, BUT thanks to my lovely life as a jetsetting PR girl, the gig sent me to Seattle, so I knocked Washington State off of my list. In true business travel form, I was in and out in less than 48 hours, BUT from what I can see, I can tell why people like Washington. 

Let me start off my saying is it melanin deficient. There was lots of non-whites, but not lots of blacks. Wikipedia told me that a lot of Asian immigrants and tourists stop in Seattle. Makes sense. 

Wikipedia did not tell me why black people did NOT settle in Seattle, but hey, there's only so many of us. We have to congregate somewhere and Seattle did not make the cut.

The city is beautiful. It's a true city. Bustling downtown, pretty skyline, water and terrain (options!!!), amazing restaurants and lots of craft beer and coffee. When I was there, I felt like everything I saw or experienced was expertly crafted. Like I should be following Seattle on Instagram because I'm going to like everything they put up.

I 100% see the appeal of the city.

In my opinion, loving the East Coast the way I do, Seattle isn't worth the 4-hour flight from Chicago strictly for a vacation. But if someone I loved was having a baby shower there, it would be worth it to go and stay a few extra days.

Let's talk about these last 15 states... it's not looking too good fam. The way my budget is set up, I can only really take one non-work trip a year (or every other year) and I'm not going to damn South Dakota on my one vacation.

I turn 35 next year, so I was thinking maybe I could do 50 by 50, but again, not taking a vacation to Idaho...  

Lastly, I have in my drafts "Things to do" in each of these states. I don't have time to dedicate to editing, proofing and updating these drafts, so it's just awesome content that no one will see. #MomLife 

Might Don't Make It States:   

  1. Alaska
  2. Arkansas
  3. Delaware
  4. Idaho
  5. Kansas
  6. Maine
  7. Mississippi
  8. Montana
  9. New Hampshire
  10. New Mexico
  11. North Dakota
  12. Rhode Island
  13. South Dakota
  14. Vermont
  15. Wyoming

Thursday, November 16, 2017

13 Things

A mom's group I'm in on Facebook asked "What do you love about your kids right now?" What a wonderful question and in such a safe place. I often worry that I'm sharing too much. Or the fact that being a mom has taken over MY life, doesn't mean that that's what people want to hear from me. So I love that there are spaces like mom groups on Facebook and my blog where I can just say my peace.

Here's my response to that question, that I want to capture for history. With babies changing daily, something that fascinates me today will be like pfft tomorrow. I want to remember all the things.

Question: What are you little ones doing right now that amazes you.
My Answer: Everything my kids do amazes me. I’ll start a list.

  1. Kiss each other without being told to
  2. Kiss me (complete with the mu-ah sound) out of the blue.
  3. Put on their own jackets.
  4. Take off their own diapers.
  5. Lahna repeating everything. EVERYTHING.
  6. Joy making sure Lahna is in clear sight before proceeding at anything.
  7. Clapping at the right times on Family Feud.
  8. And this is probably the realest/best/coolest one: they recognize & understand humor. They laugh when things are funny, even when no adults are laughing. That ABSOLUTELY warms my soul.
  9. They are very kind. They don’t see other kids often, but when we go to birthday parties & things, they always share.
  10. They’re great climbers. Mostly this scares me to death, but I am always fascinated by their ability to get to higher levels without my assistance.
  11. When they sing along with their YouTube songs.
  12. They know the difference between trash & recyclables. Ooh this warms my little tree-hugging heart!
  13. If they drop food on the ground, they know to pick it up & put it in the trash.

Wednesday, November 15, 2017

That's HER Stuff!

So we went to a block party with my friend's children this summer. The boy is 2 and his sister is 5 (or something like that). He's VERY possessive of his sister and his sister's things. It was at this event, that I realized how naturally kind my children are. Because nothing truly belongs to just one of them, they share with everyone. They ALSO, as a result, think that everyone will share with them.

So Joy goes to pick up a water bottle and my friend's son snatched it out of her hand and said his sister's name over and over again. So as to say "This is not yours. This belongs to my sister." I had never seen this behavior before, which is why my friend and I started chatted about it and I learned about some built in benefits of twins.

Fast forward, 3 maybe 4 months to this weekend. I was giving some baby clothes away. My friend, his wife and their 8 year old daughter were over. Joy sees the five bag of clothes with what USED to be her winter coat on top. She takes her OLD winter coat and goes and puts in on top of the ottoman with her NEW winter coat. I say "No baby, this is too small for you. We are giving it away to the new baby now." She seems to be ok with it and then goes about her business while we are talking.

She starts picking up boots, one at a time and transferring them into the den/playroom. Then she starts picking up winter accessories, gloves, hats, etc. and transferring them one at a time to the kitchen. Until slowly, but surely, there are two piles of new baby stuff in two different rooms FAR away from the giveaway pile.

I didn't know what was going on and my mom pointed out that Joy was taking things that she DIDN'T want them to take and putting them out of sight.

OMG! I died. This is a funny, funny baby. So then I'm thinking are my children kind? Or are my children as stingy as every other almost 2 year old, but they were just too young to show it at the block party.

Either way, I think the lesson is: babies change every day and it's my job as their mother to make sure they are giving and kind. I will definitely have some laughs about it in the meantime!

Saturday, October 28, 2017

Thanks, I'll Take It!

I currently have two checking accounts. One because it's convenient, the other because they offered me $300 to open a new checking account and I took it and it's convenient when the first one ISN'T, so I keep it.

I've had a third checking account before at a bank that was local to the Pittsburgh region, same scenario, they offered me $300. I met all their little requirements. After they mailed me the check, I walked into the bank to close the account. Now, I would have kept this third account open, excep they have NO banks in New York... useless to a New Yorker, which I was when I closed the account. I'm back home now.

So now, enter 4th bank in my life (not mentioning bank names because two of these banks have been clients of mine before and given my banking experience, a few more will be clients of mine in the future. All vague everything over here.)

Anywho, I have a credit card with this 4th bank and they serve me up an offer that says "open a free checking account and we'll give you $300, asterisk, asterisk, asterisk."

Fortunately, I can and do read disclosures. The asterisks don't phase me. Now, there will be two or three days in my life over the next 90 days where the steps I have to take to meet the requirements will annoy me, but I used to do this when I didn't even have kids.

I had logged into my credit card company to check a balance as I was balancing my checkbook to see how much money I have left to buy groceries for the week... and diapers... and hats, and scarves and gloves, because it was a brisk 38 degrees in Chicago today, and wouldn't you know it... we keep losing hats and scarves and gloves. Ah, budgeting.

So yeah, I'ma take this $300 and if they have some perks that tickle my fancy, who knows, I may keep them open and just have 3 checking accounts. Probably not.

The moral of the story is, if you offer me $300 to open a checking account. Thanks, I'll take it!

P.S. I can't believe I haven't posted since July. I mean, I can, but I can't.

Knocking another state of my list this week. I'll be back in another 6 months or so to tell you which one it was. LOL!

Sunday, July 30, 2017

This Inspiration Here...

I just read something that I think is going to change my life for the better.

Do you read Fair God Boss? If you don't, you should. It's all about working women and how to make work better for women. Almost every article I see on there is clickable. I get the email updates and there's always a profile on a dope woman telling her story.

I forgot who the woman was (And I don't have time to search the site to figure it out), BUT she was a working mom and her perspective was dope. She said she had to throw the word "balance" out of the door as in work-life balance. And instead at the end of each days she asks herself "are you satisfied."


Let me tell you why this is life changing for me.

Balance to me, indicates some fair split. I will work a fair amount of time and I will spend a fair amount of time with my kids and it's just never enough. I can never spend enough time at work. I can never get enough of my kids.

But some days I need to work more. And some days I need to snuggle with my babies more. And the contents and circumstances of each day dictates which I choose and at the end of MOST days I am satisfied with the choices I made about how that day played out.

If I spend too much time thinking about balance (T, you worked 4 wknds in a row, you're failing your daughters) or (T, you had 3 dr's appts for the girls on 3 consecutive Fridays. you're failing your team at work), then I could put myself in a never-winning situation. But if I say hey, are you satisfied with that presentation you completed by the deadline, despite listening to your babies cry while you did it? Or are you happy your babies are developing according to their charts and thankful that you have insurance to pay for those visits, then the internal conversation I'm having with myself is MUCH more positive than the work-life balance one.

Thank you, unnamed woman (ok, she was named, but I forgot) for dropping that gem on me. As soon as I find the article I will share widely on social media.

Wednesday, July 12, 2017

15 Months

Thank you online newsletter for reminding me that my babies are 15 months today. They are SO much bigger than they were as infants, but still teeny tiny babies. I haven't posted in damn near three months, so here's all the things they do now. (And I likely will have missed some milestones, but whatever).

- They are WEANED! That's right, this dairy farm is closed. I sleep all night y'all. Life is good.
- They eat real food, not pureed. Grownup food and snack. Cray cray.
-THEY! BOTH! WALK! And confidently honey! They have moves to make.
- They say some words. Joy just loves saying names and hi and hey. Lahna does all of that PLUS mimicks. If you say "say XYZ" she's going to try like hell to say it. Joy will just look at you and say hey.
- They communicate their wants and needs without saying words. They want Cheerios for dessert, they point to the top of the fridge. They want to go outside, they bring me my shoes and their shoes. They step outside to 90 degree humid weather... they turn around and come back in the house. Two nights ago Joy picked up her bath towel while I was changing Lahna, politely put it on top of the toilet seat, proceeded to go turn on the faucet (She can't reach it) and started beating on her baby bath tub. I guess she was feeling less than fresh at that moment. Too many 90 degree backyard trysts for my love.
- They disrespect child proofing. Joy has figured out how to pick up the gate. On many occasion, Lahna will be behind the gate and Joy's on the other side. She just picks the gate up, like Come on sister, I busted you out of baby jail. It's SO! FUNNY!



Anywho, my little people are little people and it's fascinating to watch. I shouldn't be surprised, but every single day they do something new or different or adult-like. For example, yesterday one square of a rug was turned up and Joy turned it back down... you know... because it was out of place and toddlers care about things being in order.

I'm having so much fun with this at this age. We love to play together. I thought 6 months was my favorite age, but 15 months might be a close second. They are a true pleasure.

So twin parents when people tell you "it gets better" and you, like me, say: WHEN? I'd say at about 13 months... or so.

Til next time!

Thursday, April 27, 2017

Played Myself

Posting this here because every time I post something on Facebook, people think I am looking for their advice. I'm not. I'm just sharing.

And my Twitter followers are like 1000 fake folks who I used to do brand work with across a plethora of clients. They like me because I give them free stuff not because they really care (pessimistic, I know. Fight me.)

Also, have a I really not posted in a month. Honestly, if I get to 12 posts this year, it'll be a miracle.

On to the story at hand...

So Joy has slept in her own bed for two straight nights without any coaxing from me. If you recall, in November, BOTH girls began sleeping through the night and my life improved significantly. At some point, Lahna wouldn't sleep in her own bed. That's still sleeping through the night now. Now she's sleeping all night and in her own bed. Great.

However, in January, I think, Joy started getting up in the middle of the night and wanting to nurse. This is clearly a comfort feed. This child will be on my breast all night. She gets up at 12 or 2 or 4 and will suckle until I get up for work at 6 am. SOMETIMES, I can push her little butt off of me, roll over and be VERY STILL and get 1 hour of sleep. But I just gave up on trying to put her in her bed if I wanted to get any amount of rest.

Also, another thing that happens is that I fall asleep nursing them. They are generally done around 9:30 p.m. and I need to get up, clean the kitchen and sterilize bottle. I typically pass out until midnight, 1 a.m., 2 a.m, whenever. Then scoop up the little munchkins into their crib and then do my chores. 

Well, for the past 2 nights without any fussing or fighting, Joy has slept in her own bed. I actually wake up at 6 a.m. discombobulated because I expect a child to me in my bed and she is not.

I had work to do after I nursed them tonight, so I decided that TONIGHT was going to be the night I wean them from night feedings.

Me: you're going to drink this bottle in your crib and go to bed.
Joy: Shiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiddddddddddddd

Me: you're going to drink this bottle in your crib and go to bed.
Lahna: Thanks Mommy for that pre-boob snack, now where's the good stuff?

Hmm... Maybe we'll wean from bedtime nursing ANOTHER DAY. I should have just been happy with them sleeping through the night. How dare I try to take any additional parts of my life back. How dare I?

Tuesday, March 21, 2017

Maintenance is impossible right now...

When you're working remotely and they forget to dial you in... "free" time to write a blog.

Maintenance is so hard for me. I used to be high maintenance (and I didn't even realize it). Someone put up a "add up your maintenance" post on FB. 3 was low maintenance, 50 was high maintenance. I scored 0. I really want to get my life and my look together, but when it comes to things I need to make time for, getting my brows done means being late to relieve my nanny or not cooking food for my kids or taking time away from work (and I can't lose my job over some damn eyebrows), but mostly I'm just too exhausted to schedule anything that not a necessity. Hence, yesterday's nightmare.

- I had a dream last night that I was on a work trip likely in L.A. in my tank top that I nurse in. It was off my shoulders like a tube top. I also had on black yoga pants and was out at a client (or maybe coworker) dinner. There was a flamboyant, horribly rude, bougie/sedity, waiter who wouldn't serve me or address me properly. So I pulled him to the side and said "what's your deal?" And he's like "it's not you, it's how you look. For God's sake, pull yourself together." So then I snapped on his ass and said I can't be great at home AND be great at work and look good. Something has to give.

- Then I told my coworkers what happened and they acted like they had no idea I looked a MESS. And then I started crying, which I HATE to do in front on coworkers. I can never tell if it humanizes me or if it makes me look weak or if it makes me look unprofessional. Either way, it was a break in my wall and it devastated me.

- So then jerk face waiter comes over, he's all excited. It's Friday. He felt bad about what he said and he's booked me for a salon appointment on Tuesday for me, and it's free and of course, his company wants to get credit for helping an overtired single mom. But then I was like "touching, but I have to go home and feed and care for my babies." And he was so appalled/surprised that I turned it down. And I was hurt because I REALLY wanted to get my hair done, but alas, Mommy duty calls.

- I woke up from that dream so angry. So many real emotions in that fake nightmare.

Saturday, March 11, 2017

Baby Decisions

My children will be 11 months tomorrow. WOW! I'm not posting their 11 month photos because that begs the question what am I doing for their 1st birthday and the short answer is nothing (in comparison to what everyone else is doing) and I can't deal with the pressure of the question (much like what are you doing for NYE), nor can I deal with the disappointment from people who really think I have my shit together enough to plan an elaborate 1 year old's party. I don't.

Anywho, the last few months my babies have been growing leaps and bounds. They are so independent-minded. Like, they REALLY know what they want to do and not do and they share that info with me often. I mean, I shouldn't be surprised that I am raising little opinionated babies, but I am surprised. I'm shocked at how many decisions they can make at such a young age. Things they have decided as of late

They both decided: 
- Who they want to hold them and/or be near them. There's nothing funnier than a 10 month old flicking your hand off of their body. My kids are like I'm sorry, do I know you? BACK! UP!
- They will no longer stay still while I change their diapers. They will do everything in their power to lunge OFF of the changing table (Which is really just a dresser with a changing pad on top of it), and as such, they've decided that Mommy should have high blood pressure again watching them trying to leap to their demise.
- They WILL hold the phone when we talk to friends and family on Facetime. So what if it's upside down or only showing their forehead. They don't care. 

Lahna decided: 
- No one can touch her face. This results in scream sessions when we try to get food and/or boogers from her sometimes very dirty face. She's always been like this, but now she has a punch and kicks to back up her likes and dislikes. I get abused often.
- To move to the beat of her own drum. This child watched Joy crawl on all fours for months while just lying there or doing the cutest little roll-scoot. In one day, she began crawling on all fours AND standing without assistance. She's like I've watched Joy fall enough. I will do it differently.
- That she will really let her personality shine OUTSIDE of the house. Whenever Lahna is around other kids, she is very vibrant and playful and sort of acts just like Joy to me. When we're in the house, she is reserved and chillin'. I guess she feels like she doesn't have to put on any shows for Joy.

Joy decided: 
- Last night, she decided she will no longer wear loose pants. She just stepped right out of them and rocked her diaper and sleepshirt. Listen, I don't like wearing pants either, I feel her.
- This morning, she decided that when she's done peeing, she will take her diaper off. I mean, just pulled one side, then the other side
- She decided that she will now turn the light off with her pointer finger (vs. her whole hand) and she will do it the entire time she is on the changing table vs. when it's time for us to leave the room.
- I think I posted this already, but Joy decided that she's no longer going to sleep in her own crib all night. She will fake sleep for 45 minutes to 2 hours, then wake up SCREAMING until Mommy nurses her back to sleep. She will also nurse for um... the entire night because Mommy will inevitable fall asleep and is too tired to pull this active baby off of her boob.

Any little human make any decisions that surprised you? Please share!

Tuesday, February 28, 2017

Tea's Tangents: Can My Days Suck Less

  • Yesterday, I made a dumb mistake at work. I apologized. Figured today will be better. 
  • Left 5 minutes late to fix said mistake, still didn't fix it. The way rush hour is set up, that resulted in me being 30 minutes late relieving my nanny. I feel like crap about that. 
  • My children no longer sleep through the night. So after feeding them cooked food, nursing them to bed, washing and sterilizing bottles I crawl into bed. I got 49 minutes of sleep, then Joy got up. Nursed her and put her back in her crib. She woke up two more times. Then Lahna woke up, which means from about 12 a.m. until about 5 a.m., I got up 4x in the middle of the night. That's not sleep. That's torture. 
  • I had a full day to work on a presentation. Only one meeting. This never happens! I spent 3 hours this morning on it, then decided to work on a smaller project. That small project included me losing a file on our shared drive and spending 90 minutes with IT looking for it. We still haven't found it. 
  • I go back to finish my presentation and someone else's work saved over the work I spent all morning doing. 
  • I'm working from home, so I decide I need some hug therapy from my babies. They are both coming down with colds and cranky and clingy and I'm just imagining that I'll have to soon take a day off to soothe them when I'm already backed up at work. 
  • On Sunday, I went out with friends for the first time since I've had my babies (so 10 months). This resulted in me not being able to do as much baby food prep as I wanted on Sunday night and now every night in between being completely exhausted, I also feel guilty that I took three hours for myself, that I should have been spending getting the babies' stuff together and they don't have well thought out meals ready during the day while I'm at work or at night while I'm home. 
  • I know that I'm supposed to focus on the fact that no one in my family is chronically ill and that's what really matters. So then when I have sucky days like this (Which, let's be honest is like 5 out of 7 days of every fucking week), then I feel bad for feeling bad about them because they're not AS BAD as they could be. 
All people ever tell you when you have a new baby or new twins is "it'll get better." Dear People, When? 

Monday, January 30, 2017

You Win Some, You Lose Some, But You Win Some More!!!

It's Monday

Before I arrived at work

Today's wins
- I made it to work "on-time"
- I changed and fed my daughters and showered before I left
- My Lyft driver waited for me
- I bought disposable coffee cups at Target yesterday, so that I can take coffee from home and not spend money in the streets
- I remember to pack my breakfast and lunch. 

Today's losses
- I woke up late, so I had to pump and give the babies a bottle rather than nurse. 
- My nanny was late, which resulted in my Lyft driver having to wait
- I forgot to put on my tank top, which keeps me warm while I'm pumping in the office
- I forgot the electrical plug for my milk pump, so that I can pump milk at work.
- The lunch I packed was spoiled, so I still had to buy lunch.
- I left my cup of hot coffee in my disposable cup on the counter
- I couldn't get my sweater over my head in time after pumping and I was late to a conference call.

After I arrived at work

More wins
- The host is also late AS HELL to this meeting, so no one noticed. 19 minutes late to be exact (enough to let me write this blog.)
- There's another woman who pumps at work and she keeps her pump in the mother's room and so I could use her electrical cord. Shout out to the monopoly that Medela has on breast pumps that made my loss, not so bad.
- This other mother also has a heater in the mother's room, so I didn't freeze my nipples off pumping milk
- While I was out getting lunch, I found a place nearby with vegan cookies AND cupcakes.
- The babies were less fussy after not being woke up before I went to work, so this is like the first step to weaning and it wasn't all emotional like I expected. It kind of just happened. 

Friday, January 27, 2017

Oh, to be Cocky

I think to be a working mom, you have to be just a little bit cocky. To think that you can manage a household, nurture two humans and manage clients and teams at work without dropping the ball (or appearing to drop the ball) on any of those things takes a woman with some unmitigated gall.

Who do I think I am, #OnToday?

Wednesday, January 25, 2017

Valentine's Day

OMG! It's in two weeks. It's going to take me that long to find outfits, gifts and come up with photo shoot ideas. Ooh wee, I'm behind.

Tuesday, January 24, 2017

Scream Free Parenting

I'm listening to a webinar called "Scream Free Parenting." I don't want to be a mean, angry mama. And sometimes I'm a mean, angry person, so it's not like it's going to just stop because I have babies, so this webinar piqued my interest.

Like many things on this blog, this is more for my future reference than your present entertainment. :)

Some key points:

- Being more emotionally separate from our children. They are individuals. We cannot manage their outcomes. We are resources to our kids, but they can manage their own lives (To a point, for example a 5 year old can tie his own shoes, don't do it because you want to do it.)  

- Don't put your anxiety on your kids. Like if you're rushing them out of the door because you don't want to be late. Just let them get themselves together and provide consequences for lateness, but you don't have to get all worked up and scream at them about being on time.

- Don't tie your emotions to their actions. If you tell them to brush their teeth and they don't, and you get all worked up, then they expect to only do things when parents are worked up. Provide sound consequences, but don't lose it. When you lose it, the child gets caught up in your feelings, actions, emotions rather than their own actions or inaction.

- Being Calm Parent is tied to raising self-reliant kids. If you get all worked up, they will expect that level of anxiety to get anything done. Then we're you're not breathing down their backs, they won't perform/deliver. 

Boundaries - she mentioned a GANG of them, but I couldn't type them. Will link the blog post when they post it.


Thursday, January 12, 2017

All Figured Out...

I figured out a way to excel as a working twin mom. I just need to eliminate eating, sleeping, pumping and personal hygiene from my schedule, then I could do it all... wait.

Friday, January 6, 2017

Yahoo! Finance...

Lord, I was a full day late, but that just means that people had time to gather all of the best memes/Tweets.

S.S. Deadass had me in TEARS!

Thank you internet, thank you.

Thursday, January 5, 2017

Having a Baby is Hard...

I'm saying this because I think people this it's simple. It's so common that I think people who don't have kids or never been in the birthing room or never really had real conversations about it take it lightly.

Mothers could die given birth. Mothers have died giving birth.

AND some moms get sick AFTER having kids. I had two trips to the emergency room and one unplanned doctors visit in the two weeks after having the twins. Not to mention the extra day I had to stay on the labor floor because I had post-baby complications.

Our bodies are wonderful, but not teflon.

I'm just saying this because I'm hoping people without kids can start to be more sensitive about what they say. Janet Jackson is 50. She just had a baby.

All people can talk about is when she is getting back into rehearsal for a concert. Sure Teyana Taylor has bounceback from the GAWDS! And even performed while pregnant, but I think for like 80/90% of moms pregnancy is hard and having a newborn is hard.

And the idea that Janet needs to be in rehearsal is the same idea that has people without kids thinking maternity leave is a vacation.

Our bodies need to recover. We need to bond with (and breastfeed our babies). Pregnancy and motherhood and not to be taken lightly just because they are common.

I hope that you will take what I'm saying to heart and not just call me sensitive or write it off. We have to stop with this super woman rhetoric and let moms be moms first and everything else second.

Sunday, January 1, 2017

Hello 2017!

I am so happy for a new year, new beginnings, new opportunities and fresh starts. I used to sit in church and listen to the preacher on 12/31 talk about how bad the year was and how your next year will be better. And I always thought, this ain't really my sermon. My year was pretty solid.

Well, I'm glad I sat in church all those years storing up those sermons for a year when I needed it. I made it to church twice this year. Two different churches and the babies were with me both times so I didn't really get to focus.

Side note: what is the purpose of taking babies to church? Besides all the nasty people kisisng and touching them, there is no way for young parents to praise God or focus on the Word while trying to get infants to be still and/or quiet. ALSO, infants don't want to be still and/or quiet. I guess if you're less uptight than me, you could drop your kids off in the nursery with all the other [germ-infested] kids and going to church would be like a 2-hour break.

That's something to keep me in mind for my future. I might drop these little buggers off and go home and take a nap. #FreeChildcare. Anyway, I digress.

As I was saying. I'm glad I sat in church all those years and I was able to recall those sermons because that message was for me this year, honey. I'm so happy to see 2017. I feel like my life is going to get easier (are toddlers easier than infants though? Maybe I played myself.)

I wish you so much love and peace and joy and contentment and happiness and prosperity and just calming of the mind in 2017. I wish the same for myself.