Monday, November 28, 2016

Holiday Anxiety...

Someone in a Facebook group asked if we had anxiety about the holidays and this was my response. She then said she meant about spending time with family. Man, that's a whole nother blog posts. I quickly erased my long comment and decided to blog about it here instead. 

Thanksgiving really used to stress me out until I decided I don't have to play these reindeer games and just stopped going home for Thanksgiving. 

As an adult, Christmas has always stressed me out (This is well documented on the blog and you all have given me lots of tips to get over this stress). Before I had the girls, I was the rich, single daughter/auntie/cousin, so I put a lot of pressure on myself to give good gifts. Some years those were financed. So over the years as I paying down debt became more important to me, I started ONLY buying what was in my cash budget OR not buying anything at all. 

Last year, I was up to my ears in twin pregnancy medical bills, so I didn't buy anything, not even wrapping paper. I'd kept a bag of things throughout the year to re-gift. This year, I didn't get any gifts throughout the year (because I have kids so they got all the stuff), so I'm not buying anyone in my family anything (and that's not expected anymore, of course.) 

BUT, I haven't decided what I want my daughters' first Christmas to be like. I don't want to be scrooge, but at the same time, they won't remember it. I could 
  • wrap a whole lot of empty boxes and tell them we were ballin' on their first Christmas. 
  • Or wrap a whole lot of stuff they already have that I just haven't taken out of the packaging yet and let them open it. 
  • OR, I could go into debt making sure their first Christmas is picture perfect. They only get one "first" everything and I don't want to look back and think "mommy was so broke, she made you skip Christmas." 
I definitely am sick of the consumerism, but I'm only sick of it because I don't have the money. I think if I had ample funds, I'd be all about it. 

When I talk to family members they still ask "what did you get for Christmas?" and I'm in my thirties. I feel this pressure to come up with a long list of stuff although I don't get anything anymore because I'm an adult and I DAMN SURE won't get anything now that I have kids. 

If we could have all the peace and joy and cheer of the season and skip the gifts, I'd be all about it.

Anything stressing you out about the holidays? 

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