Saturday, January 9, 2016

Dream Sessions: Legal Ejaculation

One side effect of being pregnant is having crazy dreams and I am not immune. I used to have like 10 dreams a night, but never remember them. I would wake up feeling the mood of the dream. Sad or scared if it was a nightmare, happy if it was an uplifting dream, horny if it was a sex dream, but I wouldn't REALLY remember what happened.

But now I remember the crazy dreams, so I'm going to try to chronicle some of them because they are funny.

Legal Ejaculation
I had a dream that the Supreme Court ruled that it was no illegal for a man to get remnants of his sperm all over the place. It was rape or sexual assault or anything like that, even if you didn't want to be around that man. So I was at a party and fell asleep and someone was squirting whiskey like champagne all over the place. And it got in my mouth and I screamed: I'M PREGNANT, I'm going to call the police. And the guy was like the Supreme Court ruling was about liquor too and this isn't illegal. So I went to the bathroom to spit out the whiskey that had gotten into my mouth and he came in the bathroom and dry humped me and I was feeling very violated and I woke myself up out of my sleep to get out of that crazy dream.

More dreams tomorrow! 


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