Sunday, December 20, 2015

Manners: Get Some!

When I had the idea to start a mommy blog (it's still an idea), I was just going to write one post every day about my adventures of riding the MTA while pregnant. IT SUCKS!

During the first trimester when I knew I was pregnant, but there were no visible signs, it was the worst.
  • I would squeeze into any train car like I did before. Moving fast was my priority. 
  • I would stand up the entire time from 135th to 23rd St. 
  • I would walk two Avenues from the 1 to 5th Avenue, so I wouldn't have to change platforms - you know, to move faster.
  • And every day I would spend the first 20 minutes of the day in the bathroom at work as a result. Just sick as hell because my body wasn't supposed to be producing two babies AND commuting like an on-the-go New Yorker.  

As I noticed my morning getting harder and harder, I changed my priorities.
  •  Now I go to the front or back of the car (most likely to get a seat there).
  • I'll let three trains pass before getting on (I'm not about to be arguing with people for bumping into my belly). 
  • I cross over to the train that includes the least amount of walking from the last stop to my destination. This adds 10 minutes to my commute, but makes sure I don't have to smell the smells of NY before going into the office. And yes, it is cleaner air in the subway than above ground. New York is disgusting. 
  • And most boldly, I just ask people to let me sit down. This, is by far, the most upsetting part of my day every day. For every person who lets me sit down when I politely ask to sit down, followed up by: I'm XX months pregnant with twins, there are between 3 and 10 people who just do not care. They do not BLINK when I say I'm pregnant. They do not shift their seats. They do not ACT like they're about to get up. They just look at me like "you're pregnant and I'm sitting down. Now that we've established facts, wtf do you want me to do about it?"
New Yorkers are so rude, when I use phrases like "Do you mind if I sit down?" they don't even know what "do you mind" means. I wish I was making this up.

You all know I don't rock with the south, but never more in my life have I desired to be in a place where people have manners. I could just imagine the men and boys tripping over themselves to make sure I don't have to carry anything or open any doors, and that I always have a place to sit.

If you want to be more independent, move to New York. You will swiftly find out that you don't matter, no one cares about you and even if they do, you are never exempt from the hustle. You don't get any special treatment for being a pregnant woman. You're out here just like everyone else, tryna make a dollar outta 15 cents: a dime and a nickel. (echoes: a dime and a nickel.) LOL!

This city is hard, folks. I can't see a long-term future here, but I'm here now, so I'll make it work. If I can give birth to twins in New York, I'm going to be basically invincible. There won't be a task you present me with that I cannot conquer. Of this much, I am convinced.

Where have you given birth? Were the people nice and accommodating or self-centered and obnoxious like New Yorkers?


Kanae J said...

My sister in law said the same thing about how the city is unaccomodating for pregnant women or women with babies. I would cry if someone didn't get their arse up while carrying my bundle of joy.

Karyn Brianne said...

Luckily, I didn't have to fool with the CTA too much when I was pregnant. Folks on the Metra were pretty accommodating on the days when I took the train. Thank God I never had to have that moment on the bus/train. My feelings would be too hurt.