Sunday, December 21, 2014

Saying Goodbye

Last Wednesday, December 10th, was my last day at Gwen's Girls. Leaving the group home was one of the healthiest emotional decisions I've ever made and at the same time it was like ripping my heart out.

Let me explain.

Remember this post, when I was crying in the car about the two girls I'm closest with leaving. Well, I'm made inroads to formally mentor them one-on-one and while that process is slower than I like, it's moving and I'm not willing to do both.

So why am I skipping the group home experience:

1. I don't have time. You've seen my schedule. I post to this blog like once a week... if that, when it used to be five to seven times a week. Being anywhere once a week religiously, is not feasible and it's just stressful as hell.

2. It's not like it used to be. I don't get through to the girls that are still in the house the same way I get through to a lot of the girls who have left. I think them seeing me so regularly, has nullified my effectiveness.

3. Things need a start and end date. When I did mentorship training, they talked about mentorship (unlike parenting) needing to have an end. I think about it like being a 5th grade teacher. At the end of the year, you don't hold onto the kids you like the most, you let them go and they go to 6th grade.

4. Practicality. I'm turning in my car to the dealership tomorrow. I will officially be on the bus and I can't make it anywhere after work at 6 p.m. on the bus. It's just not feasible. 

5. I'm STILL going to be a mentor. I have been talking about wanting to be a mentor for years on this blog and this year I finally did it. I am so proud of myself and so touched by how the girls allowed me to be a part of their lives. I'm sure that I've made a lasting impact on them, which is what I set out to do.

More on making a lasting impact tomorrow.


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