Tuesday, September 10, 2013

I Wasn't Ready

*Kevin Hart voice* Wait. No. Stop. I Can't Breathe. I Wasn't Ready.

The following was just sent to my inbox. VERBATIM. I thought I'd unsubscribed from all party emails back when I told y'all I traded club nights for lunches, brunches and dinners. Apparently some of them slipped through the cracks.

Where do I begin. First, Chicago is a city full of haters. I knew this when I lived there. I love this when I come home. Everyone is always trying to talk about reasons why they are better. Their side of the city is better. Their parties are better. Their Harold's is better. Their high school is better. A real conversation ensured about Honey Nut Cheerios vs. Frosted Flakes. I likely participated. We are petty as hell. But this.

Did they really call out red weave and wannabe-rapper faux-jewelry crowd. WHO DOES THAT? Y'all know those people spend money at the club too right? Like if you REALLY want to slow it down, hire a DJ and do this at your house with your friends. Don't hate on the club crowd, when you're promoting an event AT THE CLUB.

Moving along, as a marketer, this is the most basic, unimaginative copy I have ever seen in a party flyer. This is worst than the texts that say "It's 60 degrees and almost summer. Come party with your boy." Then turn around the very next week and say "It's 37 degrees out, but it's not cold in the club. Come party with your boy." It's worse than THAT. If you want to attract a certain crowd, use words that appeal to them. Inviting all connoisseurs of soul music to a mature set with a mellow crowd (This isn't quite right, but it took me 30 seconds).

I can't get the formatting right on this post and I keep losing content, but the point is: The following copy is poorly written, unimaginative, insulting and cliché (yes, Cherry Saturdays have been done). I want people do better when trying to market to me.

Who's going to this? Tell the truth!

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Saturday, Sept. 14th -

Cherry Saturdays Cherry Saturdays is the only EXCLUSIVE party in Chicago.

Strictly for the select few, this is NOT the party for the kool-aid red weave and/or the wannabe-rapper faux-jewelry crowd. No long lines, no riff-raff, no undesirables.

Imagine hearing Stevie Wonder, Tortured Soul, The Roots, Talib Kweli, Lenny Kravitz, Minnie Ripperton, Anita Baker and Mos Def all on the same night?

Well if this sounds like a good time, then Cherry Saturdays is the place for you.

FREE ENTRY B4 12AM if you RSVP now at cherrysaturdays@gmail.com

Doors open 9pm, party til 3am. Music by Nick Castle & Jay iLLa.

FREE ENTRY B4 12AM if you RSVP now at cherrysaturdays@gmail.com

Coup d'Etat (Did Shrine close? Someone put me up on game.)
2109 S. Wabash Ave.
Chicago, IL 60616

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1 comment:

Unknown said...

Coup d'Etat is a part of The Shrine. It's the smaller section.