Friday, January 30, 2009

Note to Airlines

Note to airlines:

When you start charging between $15 and $50 for people to check bags... people are going to stop checking bags. Guess what, we're in a recession too?

THEN it's going to take longer to board the plane because EVERYONE is going to have a carry-on bag AND a personal item;

THEN the airline will have to gate check bags FOR FREE to people's final destination when they inevitably run out of space;

AND the flight will still leave late. Causing air congestion, flight delays and a loss of money to the airlines;

AND people are going to get preturbed with your rude flight attendants screaming about who's bags can and cannot come onto the plane;

AND people are going to stop flying your airline;

It's a rather inefficient process. Try again.

This rant brought to you by T, I'm also available for business consultations, you losers.

Thursday, January 29, 2009

Quote of the Day

"See, today I was smart. I wore my Spanx to keep my legs warm."
- A woman standing behind me in the drink line who should clearly be wearing Spanx at all times, sub-zero temperatures or not.

Matter of fact, this woman was so hilarious I'm going to paraphrase what she was talking about in line behind me.

Hilarious woman: "I said to her... We're damn near 40. I have 3 kids and a husband when the fuck are you going to be done with school?"

Her friend: "She's still in school"

HW: "Girl, yeah. She has a bachelor's, a master's and a medical degree. She gone call me the other day talkin' bout she woke up and decided she can't be looking in kids mouths for the rest of her life. As long as her parents keep paying for her apartment and her Benz she ain't never gone get a job."

HF: "Really"

HW: "Yeah, and she's dating some dude that's a junior in college. Buying him clothes and shit. What could she possibly have in common with someone so young?"

Tea thinking: Well... there is this one thing. LMAO

Wednesday, January 28, 2009

Check Me Out

Please read today's [long] post below, but I'm also guest blogging over here. Check me out!

Young & Powerful... Um... Probably Not

(This is a long one, but worth every word. Trust me.)

If you live in a major metropolitan area and are between the ages of 21 and 35, you've probably heard about Young & Powerful for Obama. Until this weekend, I thought they were an official group, like Women for Obama or Believers for Obama.

Not so.

They are a collection of, dare I say, arrogant young folks who think too highly of themselves and don't have the experience (i.e. old folks) needed to pull off a classy event.

Why T? Why so harsh... well...

My young behind paid $125 to go to the Young & Powerful Group Black Tie Gala (formerly "for Obama," now they're just "group"). It was from 8 p.m. to 2 a.m.

I'll describe the scene starting with when I arrived right at 8ish (I was trying to get my money's worth, don't hate). Also, keep in mind, I throw events for a living, so I probably criticize more than I should when it comes to the finer details and I also just have high standards, especially when my money is involved.

10. I walk in, there was a woman who appeared to be in charge walking around with a cell phone in between her breasts in her strapless ball gown. (this says nothing of her colleagues with cell phones on their spaghetti straps or flip flops and gym shoes on with their elegant ball gowns) Really? At a black tie gala? You're young and powerful and you couldn't grab a blue tooth, a clutch to house your phone or even flat event-appropriate shoes? Disgusted.

9. There were people changing in the bathroom. I'm not saying I've never changed clothes in a hotel bathroom. I'm just saying, these women could have found another bathroom to change in besides the one outside of will call. Again, disgusted.

8. The person who checked my name off the list at will call looked tired and didn't welcome me or thank me for coming she just...

7. Put a tacky orange wristband on my arm. Isn't everyone here 21? Why do we have to wear wristbands at a black tie event? It really threw off my entire look. AND AND they had orange AND blue wristbands. I didn't know WY, U of I or the Bears sponsored, but apparently so.

6. The "VIP" people's tickets were not at will call. So the VIPs proceeded to will call, THEN had to turn around and go out the way they came in to get their tickets and gift bags. VIP? Really?

5. They were only giving gift bags to the "host committee" i.e. the folks who planned the event i.e. a good majority of the VIPs. Imagine the disgust of the corporate sponsor I overheard berating this aspect of the event. Clearly everyone on the host committee is already familiar with the sponsor's products and/or services. Those bags were for the general public. Whatev...

4. There was no where to sit... "T... What do you mean there was no where to sit?" I mean for $125 (discount) and $150 (full price) you had to find a seat at 1 of the 3 open tables or sit at the chairs lined up against the wall (meaning you couldn't leave your seat without your girl holding it down for you).

The other 10 tables were reserved. (yes, there were only a total of 13 tables for 500 people) How one gets to reserve a table, I don't know, but this option definitely wasn't given to me. No one wants to stand up all night in black tie gala shoes (i.e. hurt your feet shoes).

In the defense of the YPG, there was seating for about 30 people in another room, but who wants to be away from the action AND that other room wasn't advertised because the chic at will call was rude (see # 8)

3. People who did reserve tables could be overheard in the drink line complaining that randoms were sitting at their table. Why they didn't have signage signifying which table belong to which group, I can't understand, but they didn't and folks were livid. You can't call someone VIP, promise them a table, then have randoms at their table and act like there's nothing you can do about it. A mess.

2. There were only "heavy" hor douvres, no dinner. Now in the defense of the YPG, that's what the flyer said. So my bad for not looking. I killed my heavy hor douvres too, despite the fact that I had no table to set them on. Yeah, I looked like I was eating a hotdog at a baseball game, trying not to get mustard on me. Say it with me now... A mess.

1. They had the NERVE to have a program. Look dude, no one wants to hear or see a program. We want to eat, drink, be pretty and dance. That's it. You know where I was during the program, right? The drink line.

Alright, alright. There were plenty of positive things about the event. There were cuties galore, the 8-9 open bar, got extended til 10, til 11, til 12 and then eventually all night and last but not least DJ Premonition SNAPPED. By the time he came on at midnight folks were so bored and ready to get it crackin' that the dance floor juked nonstop until 2 a.m.

Can you imagine dancing to "We pop champagne... for Barack's campaign" with 500 20-and-30-somethings in pretty dresses and tuxes.


Yeah... it was hot like that.

Tuesday, January 27, 2009

Notes to Self

Often when I'm out I make notes to myself. Either in my head, or via text or e-mail or sometimes I write things down on cocktail napkins.

You see, I have a horrible memory and some things just HAVE to be noted to one's self. Here are a few of my recent notes:

1. Just because you man is with your at the club, it's not an excuse to look a trashy ass mess.

2. If you CAN wear it comfortably to the club, you probably should NOT have it on at a black tie gala.

3. When dealing-against your better judgment-with a group of young insecure women it's inevitable that one or more of them is going to throw salt on your game. Dust your shoulders off and remember not to take any photos with these hateful, inconsiderate broads, lest one of them tag you in a facebook photo and people think that you're real friends instead of party friends. ICK!

Monday, January 26, 2009

Club Casualties

The problem with going to the club with your man is that there will be pretty women trying to push up on him, who don't know he's your man.

Background.

We're at The Park in D.C. We saw Common, Lance Gross and Will.I.Am there too, but I'm digressing. We're at The Park and one of my homies wasn't feeling too good. She wasn't drunk just for all you nosey haters reading, but I went to go grab her some water.

So I'm dipping through the crowd swiftly, whispering in folkses ears that I need to get to the front of the bar 'cause my girl needs water. So an attractive brother takes pity on me, shifts his body such that we could both be at the bar at the same time and even flagged the bartender down and asked for bottled water. The bartender says how many and the brother holds up two fingers.

It's at this moment that the brother's woman (who I had not seen previously, not that I would care if I did, I'm just sayin')... the brother's woman turns around and says and I quote "What the fuck are you doing?"

The brother's trying to explain that he's not paying for anything and that he's just getting me closer to the bar for WATER. She wasn't having any of it. She looked at me, rolled her eyes and was like EXCUSE ME. He ran after her like any good sprung brother would do and I proceeded to get water for my girl.

Note to all the boo-ed up women reading this. When you take your man to the club... there will be casualties.

Coming up this week:
Notes to Self
Tea's Top 10: Wack Event Edition
Quote of the Day: Inaugural Edition
Airline RANT

Sunday, January 25, 2009

Tea's Tangents

Here are some tangents that don't fit into any of the week's posts. If you get around to reading them... enjoy.

1. Am I the only one who gets an attitude when clothes from Forever 21 are dry clean only? Hand wash, I can understand, because it's cheap and probably can't take a good machine wash. But dry cleaning? It just seems wrong to pay for dry cleaning for a clothing item I paid $19.99 for. I gotta think about next steps. LOL!

2. I straightened my hair for inauguration and it was TOO FLY if I do say so myself. I was baffled that it stayed straight for so long. I can't find a picture that really shoes the hair off, but just take my word for it.

I had to wash my hair today though, and for 3.5 seconds it didn't curl up. I thought it was stuck straight and I damn near cried. Then the water penetrated and the fro is back. Ah... I missed it!

3. I'm seriously considering suspending all non-work related trips for the year... (Per Mike... I say that every year. But I'm SERIOUSLY considering it this time)

4. Even given the trip suspension, I THINK I may postpone my condo buying aspirations for a few years. I don't want to bite off more than I can chew just to "own" or because it's such a buyer's market. Gotta stay prayed up, so that I make the right decision come August.

5. Does anyone know where I can get a Dell memory stick for my computer other than the Dell hotline? They're on backorder and I really want it now. Best Buy doesn't seem to carry them...

Wednesday, January 21, 2009

In Summary

Folks, I don't have sufficient time to eat, sleep or breathe, let alone write a blog.

I'll be back next week with the funniest quotes, rants and inauguration ridiculousness that popped off.

In the meantime, here are three songs that sum up my 5-day inauguration celebration in D.C.





Friday, January 16, 2009

Off to DC and Packing/Travel Tips

Hey folks,

I'm off to D.C. I am so happy to have some time off work, link up with friends, party at the Young & Powerful for Obama Gala, celebrate MLK service day (1/19) and of course, take in the atmosphere as we experience the inauguration of the 44th President of the United States of America, Barack Hussein Obama... my duly elected President. (WHOO, yeah, I'm still excited and overwhelmed).

Anyway, I'll see you all Tuesday and you KNOW I'll have plenty of good DC stories for you.

In the meantime check out these travel packing tips

AND

this Web site that alerts you when the prices drop on flights you're watching. Very helpful! (They send a ton of e-mails daily, so make sure you give them a personal e-mail address rather than your work e-mail address).

Happy weekend to you!

Thursday, January 15, 2009

Quote of the Day:

First, Happy Birthday to the late great Rev. Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.

Now, Quote of the Day:

"When someone shows you who they are, believe them."
-- Maya Angelou

OMG, I love this quote. It's so powerful because it's so simple to understand, yet so hard to do. I've often ignored it.

If there is someone that says that he or she is my friend, but acts differently, why do I insist on calling this person my friend?

If someone has shown that they have a problem with drugs, alcohol or other addictive behaviors, why in the world would I expect anything BUT addictive behaviors from them?

If there is someone who shows that they're incapable of giving or receiving love...Oh boy, this list could go on forever.

I just encourage everyone reading to keep this quote near and dear to your heart. As we've entered into a new year and grow another year wiser, we can no longer expect the best from people who only have the worst to give.

We have to accept that what we've seen is what we're going to get.

The only person we can change is ourselves and the only thing we can change by ourselves is our minds.

Wednesday, January 14, 2009

Encourage Yourself

The bible says David encouraged HIMSELF. That's exactly what I had to do yesterday. With some help from my lovely friends and this SERIOUS choir.

Tuesday, January 13, 2009

Engagement Stories!!!

I am an engagement connousieur. I really am. I hear THE BEST engagement stories and when I don't hear them first hand, people call me and tell me about ones they heard and forward me ones they saw on the internet. In my opinion, the best (and most crucial) part about a good engagement is the element of surprise. Top 5 that I can think of off the top of my head are:

5. Ol' boy in Atlanta who broke the bank for that serious engagement. (I'll e-mail you the full story if you want it)

4. Joi & Jesse (he made a video, had the 'rents there, lovely! See the video here)

3. Dorian and Jake (did the Michigan Ave., horse and carriage, winter wonderland theme, she thought he was being a tourist, totally surprised her. I loved it!)

2. Serena and her husband (he got her nails done beforehand, she thought they were just going to a play. Oooh I can't even explain how hot that is to me. She was clueless and surprised AND her nails were fresh to death for the photos)

1. R&P He took her to Miami for her birthday on a surprise trip, so she was completely blindsided by the proposal. He proposed on the beach after an elegant birthday lunch, P got a list of directions to a shipwrecked bottle in the sand with a hand-written note from R. After she read it, he dropped to one knee and the paparazzi (me, thummyb, Meeg and Su) caught it all on camera.

Check out this new hot new celebrity engagement story too:

Eva and Lance

On Wednesday, December 24, while vacationing with their families at the couple's favorite winter getaway spot—the Big Bear ski resort in the San Bernardino Mountains outside of Los Angeles—Marcille and Gross decided to open gifts after dinner in their rented cabin. When Marcille opened her gift—a pillow with a note attached that read: "Hope you like it. Give this pillow to the man you love and he will explain." Read the rest here at Essence.com.

What's your favorite engagement story?

Monday, January 12, 2009

Question of the Day: 1/20/2009

Where will you be on January 20th, 2009?

Are you going to work... if so, I highly advise against it. You KNOW you're not going to get any work done. You're going to be on CNN.com and CSPAN.com and facebook checking people's status updates.

I'll be in D.C. As you know from this weekend's post, I don't have tickets, but I'll be watching from the National Mall. It's going to be cold and cramped and crowded and absoulutely effing amazing.

P.S. You have until 5 p.m. EST to enter this contest to win a trip for two to Inauguration. Since I put you up on game, I'll already demanding to be your second person, K?

Friday, January 9, 2009

Going to Inauguration

"The Presidential Inaugural Committee
requests the honor of your presence
to attend and participate
in the
Inauguration of
Barack H. Obama
as President of the United States of America
and
Joseph R. Biden, Jr.
as Vice President of the United States of America
on Tuesday, the twentienth of January
two thousand and nine
in the City of Washington"

WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!

I got that in the mail today...

I'm going to Inauguration...

or so I thought. While I was looking for my actual tickets in the package I read the second page of the official stamped mailing from the President-Elect 'nem and it says "we're pleased to offer some innovative new ways for you to participate alongside your fellow Americans."

Um... I don't need innovation. I need tickets.

This is just as bad as the e-mail they sent saying "Your Ticket to Inauguration." I swear it looked JUST like the ticket to Grant Park (which was the real deal), but then it asked me to donate for a "chance" to go.

Obama's people are dream sellers, for real.

Only You

Can prevent forrest fires... house fires and all that other jazz.


My big sis lost her apartment last year in a horrible house fire. (Did I talk about that here?) They didn't have a working smoke detector, but God woke her up in the middle of the night. My sister, brother-in-law and nieces were given the gift of life in 2008.


Unfortunately, even if you decided to pray every night for God to wake you up IF your house catches fire, God doesn't let us handpick our blessings, so I want you to PLEASE get a smoke detector in 2009 AND check your batteries. Ok? I mean, deepfry some catfish and let it burn one day just to see if that bad boy goes off. Ok? You life depends on it.

I'm not playing.

This has been a public service announcement by Tea. Again, I'm not playing.

Thursday, January 8, 2009

Mike Said...

Mike said my posts are too long. So now I'm giving you all an entire extra day to read and respond to yesterday's post. Holla!

Wednesday, January 7, 2009

Tea's Top 10: The Recession

It's a new year, BUT America's still in a recession. We've known this for a long time and even though gas prices have dropped lately, people are still struggling across this great nation to make ends meet. Out of adversity comes greatness. (I don't know if that's a quote or if I just made it up, but it's true either way).

Below find my top 10 favorite things about the recession.

10. Free stuff. No need to elaborate here.

9. The sales!!! Retailers are basically giving stuff away. I've been a Macy's hater because I miss by beloved Marshall Fields, but I bought Christmas gifts there this year and between their sales, my coupons and a gift card, I got more than 50% off. It's one thing to buy inexpensive things, it's a whole 'nother thing to buy expensive things at inexpensive prices. LOVE IT!

8. Comedy. Even though I don't own a car and am not in the market for a car, I think it's hilarious that dealerships are giving away cars like hotcakes. In the Chicago suburbs there's a commercial to buy a Chrysler Pacifica and get a second car for a penny. They're giving cars away like boxes of generic tissue at Walgreens. If that's not funny to you, you have no sense of humor.

7. Less folks were out Christmas shopping, which means the stores were busy, but they weren't unbearably busy. I can dig it. (The sidewalks were thick though, folks were window shopping for real this season.)

6. Parties are free. I honestly am not a fan of paying to party, really at all. I go out WAY too much to drop $20 at anybody's door on the regular, but it's good to see that the promoters recognize that their parties don't exist in a vacuum.

5. Creativity. You have to be more creative when grocery shopping, gift giving, party planning, vacation planning, socializing, even putting outfits together. I only bought two [inexpensive] shirts and three pairs of funky tights this season for all of the holiday parties I went to. I remixed the hell outta my closet and it was kinda fun to see what I could come up with.

4. A wealth of money-saving information. The media talks about being frugal a ton now. There are so many more online articles, special segments, TV shows and newspaper articles dedicated to being frugal. You all know I'm on my cash-only grind and home savings plan right now, so the more information I have access to, the better. GO CONDO PURCHASE GO!!!

3. Increased saving. Of course I'm saving because I'm looking to buy a house, but it's so good to see everyone saving or attempting to save. Before this recession I feel like folks (myself included) were just relying on credit to get them through. Clearly that's not going to work anymore and I love getting back to our roots of saving cash.

2.It's ok to be broke. No one looks at you like you're crazy when you say "What's our budget for the evening?" or when you say "I'd rather drive around and look for parking than to pay valet right off the bat." Also, when you tell people you can't afford to do dinners/parties/fundraisers/basically anything that's outside of your pre-determined budget, they understand. There's definitely less pressure to flaunt your tax bracket.

1. Relationship building. People are getting together for tea (*blushing* lol), coffee and movie nights and finding other matinee ways to enjoy each other's company. I think this is the absolute best part about the recession.

Question of the Day: To be positive, in what seems like negative times, what's your favorite part about the recession?

Tuesday, January 6, 2009

Do You See What I See: Pro-Athlete Edition


Um... really, Joakim Noah? This is an atrocious mess right here. According to PyT, he's broken a man law by wearing colored jeans. Phat contract or not, I do not approve.

Monday, January 5, 2009

Fun Times at the gym

Hey Folks,

Welcome back to work or school (or whatever else you're using Tea & Such to procrastinate from). I missed you all!

So everyone's doing New Year's resolutions... I don't do that, but more power to you. For folks who have resolved to lose weight (and/or be healthier), peep this site that's offering free recipes and a free 30-day pass to Bally. You can't beat free with a stick.

Now, on to today's post. You all know I'm on and off the fitness train. Right now I'm on. I had 12 straight days off work (YAY!) and I went to the gym 10 of those days. *Patting myself on the back* I'm also trying to get into this formal dress for inauguration. Easier and cheaper to lose weight than to buy a new dress (There's always a dress...) I digress...

I was talking to a homie and he said I "spoil myself at the gym," referring to the fact that I don't think working out should be torture. I do the bare minimum and peace out. Unless you're a model, professional athlete or some other person who depends on their fit body to eat and pay bills, then I just don't believe in pushing it that hard. Give me 30 minutes juking on the elliptical and that's enough. (Yes I said juking on the elliptical, you should hear my workout playlist).

Friday I decided to try a new class at LVAC called "Workout Challenge." I knew from the description that it wasn't going to be fun, but there was no hip-hop dance, pilates or even aerobics classes at the time I wanted to work out and, for once, I wasn't really feeling the elliptical. Of course, my guy's workout judgment was secretly getting to me, so I decided to "challenge" myself.

I go to the class and the first thing we do is jump rope in place. 1) My coordination is not all that hot and 2) WTF?

We do 2 and a half minutes of jumping rope, then a bunch of squats and other unnecessary stuff, then 2 and half more minutes. About 30 seconds into the second set of jumping rope, my heart starts jumping into my throat and I feel a faint coming on. For those of you that don't know I have a tendency to faint. (It's called vaso vagal syndrome, no big deal really). I just need to pay attention to my heart rate and slow it down when necessary. Well... Friday it was necessary. I promptly put that jump rope and those heavy ass weights back and hollered at my usual eliptical machine.

No pain, no gain is fine... for the rest of y'all, but I'm just trying to keep my heart in order. If I'm getting chased on these Chicago streets, I want to be able to outrun my attacker. That's about it. I'm not doing any marathons, triathlons or anything ending in thon, really. Your girl's just trying to ward off the obesity, diabetes, heart disease (and sheer laziness) that seem to plague my family and my community.

If you find a fun (and simple) strength training class, let a sister know, but you won't find me jumping rope, running obstacles courses or any other faint-inducing behavior in the name of good health.

Happy Monday!

Thursday, January 1, 2009