Thursday, July 23, 2009

A friendly game of Spades

I hope you laughed when you read the title because you KNOW there is never a friendly game of spades. A game of Spades is SERIOUS business and fourth of July weekend kicked off with a house party. Complete with birthday cake, liquor and of course, spades.

So I get to the party on CP time and notice the game going and ask the fellas if I could get next. I don't have a partner. Thummyb was with me, but she doesn't really play like that. I'm good, but I don't play often enough to be great. I'm an awesome trash talker though, so if you lose a game, please believe you'll hear about it. And of course, I'm going to point out the fact that you got beat by a woman.

So I'm drinking, taking obligatory shots, then it gets hot in the house, so we roll to the back deck to chill out. Next thing I know TT is saying I got next. It's someone at the table that wants to be my partner and everything. So we're playing best out of three and quickly get whoever's been running the table up. So our next opponents are some guys from around the way that surprisingly no one knows. They're drinking on what smelled like sizzurp and they're real passionate about the game. Truth be told one of the syrup-drinking duo was telling me how to play and helped me win that last game. (I told you, I'm good not great).

So we're playing and these dudes are talking across the table. Basically asking their partners what they have in their hand. I'm like naw, shut that down immediately. This is Tea & Such, so I'll keep it PC, but the expletives coming out of my mouth that night were scaring grown men.

All I know is TT and someone who I'd just beaten in a game of Spades kept saying "Man, she going hard." I wasn't paying them any attention though. I was in the zone, playing the game and making sure these fools werer't trying to play me. So then after the talking across the table, we win a game, then it's their deal. They're looking at cards and giving their partner the best cards. They held one of my books talking about they're waiting for me to renig. Like B. Scott would say Bitch. Boo. Bye. I know how to play, how dare you assume that because I have a female reproductive organ I'm going to renig in a game of spades.

Now, truth be told these dudes were a little scary and we live in Chicago and no one really knew who they were, so in between expletives, I was flirting a little bit. Gotta keep my life safe. So they win the second game by one book. And we get ready to deal. My partner deals and somehow they call it a misdeal so it goes to the next person. The opponent deals. They look at their hand then decide they don't have the right amount of cards and throw their cards on the table. They DID have the right amount of cards, but apparently didn't like what they had in their hand. So now it's my deal since dude couldn't get his ish together. Even tipsy, I'm still good with numbers. So they claim I messed up the count. I didn't, but I was like the only way I'll keep playing is if you let me deal again. They did.

Then the opponent to my left took one of my cards while I was dealing.I stopped dealing the cards and gave him the look of death. He was like "ma, be easy. This is my card, I'm sure of it." At this point I'm furious, but I'm like ok, we'll see. I count my cards and I have 12, which means he did take my card, so it could be yet another re-deal. This would make it the fifth re-deal for the same damn hand of cards. EFF THAT! I dropped the cards on the table and hopped up with my beer in my hand. I hopped up so fast that people thought I had fallen and rushed over to the table to see if I was ok. In the meantime I spilled beer on myself and at least two men.

TT sat down at the table in my spot and the opponents proceeded to cheat again at which point everyone in the room left them at the card table by themselves.I kid you not, these fools started playing Go Fish. (Sizzurp).

Now, what's the point of this story... I have no idea, but TT said I should give my account of what happened, so here it is. He's going to give his account in a guest post tomorrow. Trust me, you don't want to miss it.

3 comments:

antithesis said...

*faints* i am dying over here. and then the n-words proceeded to play "go fish"???? u cant make ignorance like that up! i dont play spades in public but let some mess like that for whatever reason happen to me. my mouth is gonna get me killed one day. almost did on prom night.

RB said...

Oh I applaud you on the little patience you had...I was getting upset just reading your post lol...but Go Fish?! *dead*

ThummyB said...

I would just like to clarify that...it's not that I don't like spades. I just never learned how to play as a kid. Now that I'm an adult, I would like to learn...but ppl take the game to damn serious for me to jump in as a newbie. That.Is.All.