Friday, June 12, 2009

Black Women's Voicemails

Have you ever noticed a trend with black women's voicemails. We are SO extra sometimes. It's like a bunch of us have THEE worst attitude on voicemail and the rest of us are the most serene individuals in life on voicemail. It's so funny because before I changed my voicemail to just be the standard you've reached XXX-XXXX, I used to have CRAZY messages too. Here are some of mine and some of the ones I've heard.

Hi, you've reached Tea and I'm at the Taste of Chicago right now, so I might not be getting any reception on my phone. PLEASE leave a message and I'll hit you back when I get back to the 'burbs.

Hi, you've reached XX and I'm out of daytime minutes for the month. Please text me until April 1st or call back after 9, Thanks.

Hi, you've reached Tea and I broke my phone over the weekend. If you leave a message, please leave your phone number even if you think I already know it or you can call me at work at XX.

Hi, you've reach XX, I can't really receive missed calls when my phone is off, so if you'd like me to return your phone call or even know that you called at all, please leave a message.

Hi, you've reached XX. If you want a return call, please leave your name and number and repeat your number twice or talk slowly when you leave it. BEEP.

Peace brothers and sisters, you've reached the voicemail of XX. Leave a message and I'll get back to you at my earliest convenience. Namaste

Hi, you've reach XX. I can't get to your call right now because I'm out enjoying life. (T.I.'s live your life on in the background). When I come back down off this high, I'll return your call... maybe. (This one is paraphrased)

Praise the Lord. You've reached XX, leave a message and we'll get back to you as soon as we get in from church. And remember God will give you peace that passes all understanding. BEEP

Favorite TMI voicemail: You've reached Tea. I will be out of the country on vacation until Day, Date, Time with no access to voicemail. If you need to reach someone immediately, please dial 0. Otherwise I will respond to your message when I get back from vacation. HAVE A GREAT DAY!!!!

5 comments:

antithesis said...

reminds me of one of the students in the summer program i worked at. "...my phone is BA-roKe. please call the house number if you know it..." aww, u have to hear it.

u dont know how excited i got when u said ur gonna be in dc. i hope two weeks is NOT the 26th-28th because i'll be in ohio. if you say it's that weekend i will cry. im serious. picture a red-eyed antithesis sniffling. got that image? ok? then dont do that to me.

Kismet said...

damn.

i think you got me like twice on this jont (joint in DClinguish)

I DEFINITELY remember being over minutes LOLOL.

K to the... said...

lol I think my fave is...

"Hi, you've reach XX, I can't really receive missed calls when my phone is off, so if you'd like me to return your phone call or even know that you called at all, please leave a message."

b.enchanted said...

LOL at "Namaste"

PyT said...

Dead at Namaste..

Also, can't help but laugh at "and remember God will give you peace that surpasses all understanding..." lol