Saturday, May 31, 2008

Cleaning House

So you all know it's spring cleaning time and when I get in a cleaning mood, I'm like Mrs. Pinesol or Mr. Clean, I go deep. You saw all those sample travel kits I had to get rid of...

Anyway, have you ever made a decision to clean out your closet and made these kinds of statements to yourself.

1. Why Do I OWN this? - I mean WHAT was I thinking when I purchased this item right here? It doesn't fit, it doesn't flatter me, it's not my style. On the overall it does NOTHING for me.

2. Why do I still have this? It doesn't fit ANYMORE, It doesn't flatter me ANYMORE and it's not my style ANYMORE.

3. Oooh, I forgot all about this. I need to definitely work it into my
weekly/monthly routine.

4. This is SO HOT. I knew I did a good job at the store with this piece.

Well, I recently took a "closet inventory" with people in my life. Some people are useless in the sense that they just take up space in my emotional closet like statement #1. It's not even clear WHY I ever had them in my life in the first place. They don't share my values, my interests, my goals. By circumstance we were called together and like that initial purchase in statement #1 it may have seemed like a good idea to have them around, but it was a bad judgment call on my part.

Some people have just served their purpose. People grow apart and that's ok. These people, like statement #2, are the kinds of people who you go to dinner or coffee with after a long time not seeing them and then realize your paths have become so different that it's a miracle that you're sitting at a table together. I thank God for the blessing these people were in my life and for the new paths he has given to each of us.

Other people are so wonderful and so like me that I realize I don't spend nearly enough time with them (like statement #3). When blessed with the gift of time, I try to cultivate these relationships. Or people who may have been semi-close are getting really closer because our goals, aspirations and ideals line up so beautifully.

Lastly, there are some people who are the exact right choice for me. I cannot get enough of these people in my life and I am so glad that we've found each other and HAVE been able to cultivate the bond that we have. I see them as "classic pieces" in my emotional closet and love them dearly.

Doing an emotional closet inventory is so helpful and freeing. Not only does it free up emotional space, but after you eliminate 1 and 2, it frees up so much time for 3 and 4.

Hope you all have an emotionally clutter free day!
T

Friday, May 30, 2008

Attention blk_sun...

And to any other naysayers who may think that teaandsuch has turned into a "bitchfest" or "constant whining about every little thing that doesn't go smooth in my life."

This is TEA and such.
This is not blk_sun and such.
This is not happy all the time and such.
This is not happy happy joy joy and such.
This isn't even don't worry be happy and such.

This is MY blog. I'm going to say what I want to say. And guess what you've been doing... reading it. Are you not entertained?

I'm not happy all the time. That's not my personality. Your blow with the wind attitude just isn't me. Things DO matter. Somehow despite your constant jabs at my posts, I still have a plethora of supportive readers, who also don't mind me being myself.

Your little rude remarks are making it seem like you expected something other that what you're getting (an entertaining read). I never said that tea and such is where you should come to be uplifted. This is and will always be tea and such... just tea and such. Nothing more, nothing less.

If you don't like it, don't read it.

Real Quick

Though I'm good at what I do and confident in my craft I AM NOT SUPERWOMAN. I have done SOME extraordinary things, so I guess people now expect me to be swooping in and saving the day all the time.

I won't be.

Wednesday, May 28, 2008

Only 15 days left

So, I just found out Sweat Shop is closing. In my biased opinion, it's the #1 reason to live in East Lakeview and it's closing. I'm super sad. It may seem silly for me to be so attached to my gym, but I LOVE MY GYM!

The owner is moving to Florida. I've never seen him before, but the general manager is the sweetest lady named Nancy. She's almost always there and I see her around the neighborhood frequently as well.

The good news is that they sold our memberships to Lakeview Athletic Clubs (LVAC), which is one of the premium clubs in Chicago. This club has a track, a pool and a rock-climbing wall (none of which am I planning to use). I hope they have free towels and friendly instructors and all the other niceties of Sweat Shop.

I saw Nancy on the way out today and I asked if she'd be moving to LVAC as well and she had this sad smile on her face. She said yes, I was one of the lucky ones, thanks for asking. I could tell she really cared about her job and the Sweat Shop. I hope everyone else gets a job somewhere that makes them happy. :)

I'm a pack rat

So you all know how much I travel right? That's pretty much been the case for the past 4 years. I'm always on the go. Go. Go. Go. Well I tend to keep all the travel size goodies from the hotel rooms, but I also happen to be a pack rat. What started out as grabbing a couple of bottles of lotion to keep at my desk or in my purse or grabbing a few toiletries to give overnight guests has turned into a space-taking nightmare.

I was tending to my bathroom on Sunday (so glad I finally got around to that one) and I decided I needed to free up some space. I figured all these hotel samples could be placed elsewhere or donated to charity. LAWD, I didn't know how many I had. I started to separate them into different Ziploc bags and it looked like I had just been raided by the police. LOL!

I had to take a pho-to:




Tuesday, May 27, 2008

East Lakeview Campaign #2

The #2 reason you should move to East Lakeview is because it's walking distance from North Avenue Beach. Now if you live Southeast, then this is going to be a weak case for you. But for you West, Northwest and Southwest siders, trust me, there is nothing like easy access to the beach when the weather's nice.

Now in fairness the beach is in Lincoln Park, but I'm definitely not moving to Lincoln Park. It's nice to visit, not so much to live. I don't even have a car, but it's congested to walk over there...

Anyway, the weather was GLORIOUS in the Chi yesterday. Matter of fact it got to like 84 degrees, but it was a little cloudy. [Today it's 44 degrees... it's like the weather had to go back to work too]. Yesterday was a perfect day to sunbathe... I did. I hit up Sweat Shop in the morning. Then in the afternoon, I filled up my 64 oz water bottle, stopped at Subway for a $5 footlong *singing like the commercial* then stopped at Borders on Broadway and Diversey for a new book before walking to the beach. :)

As I was walking, I was thinking, it would be great to have a friend to walk to the beach with. Someone who wouldn't have to drive up here and pay for parking OR drive around for 30 minutes when they get here looking for a parking space.

Wouldn't it be great if that friend was you? Don't you love the beach? Don't you love being able to walk to Subway, Borders and pretty much ANY other thing you could need in life. (Jewel-Osco, Walgreens, Chipotle, Coldstone, Best Buy, DSW, Linens and Things, Express, the Chicken Hut...). Of course you do. So what are you waiting for? MOVE TO EAST LAKEVIEW. You'll LOVE it!

Monday, May 26, 2008

T.T.D.M.P.G.E. Part 3 continued

That last one was getting too long...

3. Facebook and Myspace messages and emails about a party

Oh, this could be it's own post, but I'll keep it succinct. Not only does everyone collaborate on parties in the Chi contributing to the tapped market, but they also send you an email, text message, facebook event and myspace message about the party from EACH of the collaborators. You've got it folks. I have 12 different messages in 4 different media spaces ABOUT THE SAME PARTY. It's enough to make you not want to go AND delete people from your fb and myspace friends lists. [Both actions I take frequently] I mean, trust me, if it's going to be the hottest thing since sliced bread, I'm sure I'll hear about it without 12 messages...

4. Not having a car

You all know I tend to be very punctual. Me and thummyb are the only people I know like us. Everyone else in my life is always late. Either 5 to 10 minutes late or 2 to 3 hours late, but always late. [Holler if this doesn't apply to you and I'll edit the post]. In every other facet of my life punctuality works to my advantage (work, weddings, church, meetings), but as far as socially, this really puts a damper on my kicking it time.

The problem is that I am always ready to go a LONG time before my ride comes to get me. Tonight, my ride was so late she didn't even make it into the club. I got tired of waiting and took a cab. (I actually had a much better experience tonight than I usually do waiting for a ride, let me just tell you).

Now, truth be told, I told my ride I was ready to go about an hour before I actually was... to get her to kick it into high gear (If you're reading cuz, sorry, love you!) But it didn't do a bit of good. All's well that ends well, but my P.G.E. would be much better if I had a car (well... maybe... because I couldn't really drink like I do if I was driving and the dranks positively enhance a majority of my club-going experiences.)

5. People that don't say excuse me

I understand that the party is crowded, but a blatant disrespect for the fact that I am actually STANDING in the space that you're trying to occupy is infuriating. (Stay tuned on a post about this from a communication professional's perspective) Contrary to popular belief, I've been letting it go lately, 'cause I'm on my grown woman, but it makes me itch and I hope I'm not forced to scratch anytime soon.

6. Short dudes that are infatuated with breasts

Dude, LOOK UP. You are 5'4 and I have on 4 inch heels, so it's already like I'm talking to an 8 year old. Worse than that, my breasts aren't big at all. Find some business PUH-LEEZE.

7. Married Men at the club

[Most of] These dudes are the worse. Without a ring, they're trifing, no explanation needed (but I might write a post on this... stay tuned). With a ring, they may or may not be trifling. Tonight a dude told me that he wears his ring to the club because he justs wants women to know upfront what the deal is... WHA - AT?!?!?!?!

I was like um... yeah, I hear my friends calling me, goodbye. People are a new kind of low and disgusting and the sad part is that someone would have went along with that program. *singing like Prince* I AIN'T THE ONE.

7. Bartenders that act like they're doing you a favor

It's Memorial Day weekend people. Only newcasters and CTA bus drivers have to work tomorrow. EVERYone else was at a bbq or party of some sort tonight. Why in the WORLD would you have maybe 6 bartenders in the whole place (servicing hundreds of people)? Then the bartenders act like they're going to get more tips if they make fewer drinks. Yes, I know your job is stressful, I get that... HOWEVER, I'm not moved by your pain. I'm pretty sure there's not a draft for bartending AND we live in America, so I think it's safe to say YOU CHOSE TO WORK HERE!

Both of my jobs are stressful, but I put on a happy face and do it because guess what, they both pay. Not to mention those severely obese tips they get that they don't always report to the government. Take a chill pill and/or a drink and just make me a martini. Please.


Just for fun:

This doesn't mess up my P.G.E., but I do take note when it happens:

7. Ugly people checking themselves in public mirrors

It's almost like they're like yep... still ugly.

T.T.D.M.P.G.E. Part 3

So I just got in from the club AND it's a holiday AND I took a nap at 8 p.m., so I'm going to be up for a while. What better time than now to write TTDMPGE Part 3. This may be a long on

In case you're a new reader, we've already covered rude boucers,
B$%W$^ at the door, wack DJs, 19 and 20 years olds and mandatory coat check.

And as you can see below, I take requests. Sigh. This may be a long one.

Disclaimer: I had a great time at the club tonight!!!

By request:
1. The tiny a$$ bathroom with like 2 stalls and one sink

Ok, so you're at the club, having a wonderful time drinking like you just got paid and you have to go. But the DJs been playing YOUR SONG for the past 30 minutes and you just couldn't leave the dancefloor. Now you REALLY have to go. You get into the bathroom and surprise, surprise, there's one stall... IN THE WOMEN'S BATHROOM. It's a commonly known fact that women take way more time in the bathroom than men. Even in a not-crowed restaurant a one stall set-up in a mistake. I mean, seriously.

Now if you happen to NOT be the drunk girl, you have to deal with the drunk girl tapping on the door while you're trying to do your business pleading with you to hurry up. You come out and this broad almost throws up on you, then you have to manuveur around her to get to the ONE sink in this bad boy that some prissy girl is already occupying. Seriously, this is enough to make you not drink any beverage when you go out, let alone alcohol.

2. Having you print off your confirmation or show your text message

So we all go to parties that require you to RSVP to get in free before a certain time. USUALLY the party promoters have a list of everyone who's RSVPed at the door. You give your name and they let you in gratis. Cool.

Well some "entertainment companies" By entertainment company I mean: random group of dudes who got together and figured it was a good idea to throw parties and now they want to act like they're the coolest kids on the block...

So anyway, they get together and decide it'll take too much time to print the list of people, so these losers require you to print off your confirmation email before you get there. Now, let's be clear on what's happening here. I'm going to a place that ANY other night of the week I could get in for free, but because you're throwing a party, I now have to pay $20 [to essentially see you and your boys and all the other chics I see every other Friday night, which you might as well do at someone's house, and we have and it's just as much fun...]

Digressing is a disease of mine.

So I have to "pay" $20, but I decided that's unacceptable and will get there early enough to get in free and you want me to print out the confirmation. Dude, do you want my social security number and mother's maiden name too? I mean if you're a "company," don't be so lazy, do the work of a company, which includes more than sending out emails and facebook invites to your party.

Thursday, May 22, 2008

Why you should move to East Lakeview #1

Like one of my girls from work would say, I've been a little "anti" with the blog posts lately. I guess I can drop a positive note tonight. (Trust me, it won't be nearly as entertaining as my usual rants).

I just came from my gym, Sweat Shop. I took a Pilates class. I LOVE my gym. I was the only person who showed up for the class, so the instructor did the class with just me. Now that's good customer service right there! (And a free personal training session for me if you want to look at it from an economics standpoint.)

And boy, she had me twisted up like a pretzel. I know I'm going to feel this one in the morning. BUT I'm so excited that she saw the value in giving a quality class no matter the quantity of students. YAY, Sweat Shop!

My official campaign to get at least one person who isn't a friend from work to move to my neighborhood has begun. North side anyone? I have guest passes to my gym if you want to go with me one day. :)

Disappearing Compartments

So it's social media week at my job. I have been instructed to shut down my email and engage in "social media" from 10 a.m. to 11 a.m. CST. LMAO! I HAVE to do what the rules say, right? So I decided to take this time to blog.

(Don't you love my job!?!)

Anyway, at the beginning of the week everyone was instructed to create a myspace or facebook profile. I was out of town [working] when this instruction came forth, so I was a bit confused when I got a bunch of facebook friend requests from co-workers. The most alarming was a friend request from the second in command at my company. She's awesome, she sits three doors down from me, she's active in professional organizations, which is how I met her AND she referred me for the position. Besides having an excellent eye for talent she runs the hell out of this business and is genuinely a nice person. I mean, I love everything about this woman.

BUT does she meet the qualifications to be my facebook friend? NOT ATALL! However, I'm not silly. I know I HAVE to add her as a friend. When the request came through, I was immediately panicked. I was thinking what does my facebook status say today? What did my friends or my little carefree college-aged brothers write on my wall today? Which pictures did I put in my album? Oh LAWD... what am I going to do? So you know I put her on limited profile right?

This brings me to the topic at hand. When one facet of your life spills into the other. I am awesome at compartmentalizing my life. I have 5 email addresses, all of which handle different parts of my life. I live on the north side, go to church on the south side, hang out with the fam in the 'burbs, socialize downtown and PARTY OUT OF TOWN. I have true friends, work friends, high school friends, college friends, church friends and party friends (to name a few sets of friends).

I have high school friends who have become family, work friends who have become true friends and true friends who have become employees at my workplace. My church friends became college friends and now are vacation friends, and let's be honest, ALL of MY friends are party friends.

Side note: for some reason everyone's "just party" friends get it twisted thinking that they are vacation friends. I'm not going out of town with YOU, dude!

I digress. The point is no longer do we live in an age where we can show some of ourselves to some of the people we want to see it. I can't do my job and go home. I'm an advocate of the programs I work for in online social media and face-to-face networks. [Anyone who knows me also knows I'm a big advocate of my company].

In this new social networking era though, we've become a part of the "look at me" generation. Look what I'm doing, look what I've done, encourage me to do better (people really need to get therapists and stop using facebook to counsel their problems via the status updates, though).

I'm digressing again. This idea of working 8,10, even 12 hours and going home is dead in 2008. You are always who you are, an employee of your job, a member of your church, an alumni of your school. You are always on now. Anything you say or do on or off of company premises can get you fired and/or promoted. Networking, i.e. promoting yourself and/or your company or your affiliations outside of your their normal spaces is an absolute must and it's no longer only taking place in traditional settings.

This openness that the internet has afforded us is, to say the least, scary. The point is, just because I work with you or know you or went to high school with you or go to church with you, doesn't mean I necessarily want you knowing what I did on vacation or that I even went on a vacation (or what I looked like in high school... ick!)

What's really tripped out is that I OPT IN to these social networks for personal use, but now they are becoming a part of my job responsibility. Soon, I'll HAVE to create alternate profiles, my work profiles and my personal profiles, to get the tasks of my job done. (i.e. if my client has something to promote on facebook, I'm not going to use my personal account complete with my sarcastic remarks, ignorant friends' wall commments and Operation Desert Storm photos to disseminate client info.)

Wednesday, May 21, 2008

Quote of the Day

I just almost had a heart attack... about a PIZZA. Blog about that.
- anonymous

Question of the Day

Where should I take my next international trip? I've been to Spain, Venezuela and the Bahamas and that's really all I have on international trips (I think).

So I have some miles that will get me a free ticket [virtually] anywhere I want to go. Where do you all think I should go?

Tuesday, May 20, 2008

Question of the Day

Why don't married people wear their wedding rings?

Quote of the Day

Background:
So, the workout plan is not really going as expected. I was on a schedule, but I didn't really focus on toning, perhaps as much as I should have. I haven't seen my older sister in a little while and this weekend I was visiting for my nieces birthday. I showed her photos from Operation Dessert Storm and one is in a bikini and it's not all that flattering.

Now let's be clear, I'm smaller than most, so I look better than most in the bathing suit, but as far as slim girls go, I was working with a little something extra in this picture and my sis noticed the weight gain.

Looking back and forth from the scantily clad photo to my fully dressed body my big sis said:

"I've never seen you get this big. You know T, there's a fat girl inside of you dying to get out."

Monday, May 19, 2008

I'm surrounded by incompetence

So I've been on the phone with US Airways for the past hour and 39 minutes. I've hung up, called back, been transferred. I had several things I wanted to do.

1. Ensure that my miles are being counted because I have an AmericaWest number and haven't received a new card since the merger.

2. Request a new card.

3. Get the confirmation number for my upcoming travel to Nassau to give to R&P's travel agent for their wedding. (Side note: I'm going to write a long post on this chic when the nuptials are complete).

So anyway 1, 2 & 3 are the kinds of things that should only take 15-20 minutes at the most right? Well, why has it taken me so long to get it done? Simple, because US Airways outsources it's phone center help. I can't understand what any of the women on the phone are saying, she can't understand me. This has resulted in me having to talk slower and repeat myself several times.

They're also answering questions I didn't ask them.

I got 1 and 3 handled and I'm currently on hold to figure out what to do with number 2. She gave me instructions on how to get a login and password, which has nothing to do with number 2. I made her stay on the phone with me while I was doing it because it didn't seem like she was giving me the correct instructions. She wasn't. WHY would I need a new login and password, when I KNOW my login and password. What I want is a card sent to my home with the USAirways on it, instead of America West.

I'm on hold again. Now she comes back and tells me they ACTUALLY don't send cards out to the home anymore. I guarantee you that if the call center was in America and I asked someone for a simple request like a new card, it would not result in me being on the phone for almost 30 minutes just for them to get back on the phone to tell me they no longer send cards out.

I'm not angry, my qualification for getting noticeably angry is much higher than it used to be. Low expectations are the key with "customer service" represenatives. I'm simply sharing an account of the incompetence that surrounds me with the blogosphere. It's truly baffling.

Friday, May 16, 2008

Charlotte, North Carolina

Get ready family, this is going to be a long one.

Everyone that knows me knows I have a list of cities that I’d consider living in. Just like now, I tend to have a lot of free time to think about these things. I’m a single woman who’s fully vested in her 401K. I have interns, an administrative assistant and like my best friend reminded me this morning, I also have a door that closes and a speaker phone. I’m basically saying your girl has options and I spend a great deal of time deciding how I’m going to exercise them.

So my cities I would live in list includes Chicago (of course), New York, D.C., Denver, Phoenix [recently added] and my favorite, Charlotte, NC.

Now, if you know me (or even in you don’t) you’re probably scratching your head thinking why Denver and Charlotte? We’ll talk about Denver at another time, but I LOVE CHARLOTTE!

It’s not a place for a single girl like me right now, but I could totally settle down with a family here. There’s not a lot to do, but there’s enough to do. The people are really nice and it’s pretty here. It’s south, but it’s far east enough to have that flavor as well. It’s one of those places that I visited that just felt like home. It’s definitely on top of my list.

Well…it was.

Disclaimer: I am not angry. I was recently told that my direct blantantly-honest nature may come off as angry [and/or rude]. I just happen to be an extremely passionate and honest person, so my feelings show through in everything I do (especially my facial expressions) and in this case, they show through in the tone and verbiage I use to describe this story, which was the preturbance I felt at the time, but I’m not angry now and I wasn't mean to anyone. :P

Back to the story: As I stepped out of the airport and into the Avis van (no need to stop at the counter because I’m preferred select and my car will be waiting for me), I was told that my name wasn’t listed and I didn’t have to get out of the van, but I’d have to stop by the counter at the lot. This same exact thing happened in Atlanta, so I double-checked my reservation to see if I’d made a mistake, like I did in Atlanta. Matter of fact, I sent myself a quick email via text to remind my admin on Monday to make SURE AmEx travel has my preferred flyer, car rental and hotel numbers.

But there were no errors made on our end. I definitely had a reservation, my admin didn’t mess up, AmEx business travel didn’t mess up. I was curious to see exactly what had happened.

I get to the counter and proceed to the preferred line. There was a lady in front of me and when they found out I was preferred they asked her to move to the other (long azz) line (Hilarious!) So anyway, I see my name on the counter and say is this for me and the attendant is like yes, please proceed to car E15. Cool! I get outside and one of the chivalrous Charlotte Avis reps offered to go get the car for me. Cool! He comes back, there’s no car in E15. I walk back into the counter, totally disrespecting the guy who was at the counter now and alert ol’ girl that there’s no car in E15. She’s becomes increasingly concerned and asks dude to step aside (cause I’m important) and finds me another car. Ok, I get a convertible mustang and proceed to roll out.

I follow the mapquest directions (which are almost correct this time) and as I’m driving, notice the country behind me the clearly defined “city” ahead of me even though the airport is smack dab in the middle of the “city.” As I pass Church’s Chicken, the “paper doll lounge” and “the barbeque shack” I try to remember what exactly about this town had me so enamored.

I got lost driving, of course, and quickly stopped at a gas station, that was approximately one highway stop from my destination, to ask for directions. People who clearly live in the area had NO IDEA how to get to where I wanted to go. It was less that a mile away folks.

I mean, I literally talked to about 5 people to finally get the directions, which were to take the street I was on the opposite direction for like 5 blocks and my hotel would be on the right. Really, it took 5 locals for that, Really? I’m now starting to truly understand the WTF moment a close friend had when someone suggested she move here.

So I’m doing ok when I get back in the car and I finally get to my hotel, it says to check in before you park in the garage. Cool. I was just happy I made it. I take my wallet inside and proceed to the counter. I didn’t have to wait at all. Things were looking up. I give them my name. No record of me on file. SERIOUSLY? So he says do you have your confirmation number. I did have it, in the car. Why would I bring it inside when they are the hotel and should have record of who’s staying here? [Yet another instance of people not having their ish together and needing me to help them do their damn jobs]. So, I grab my travel arrangements and check in and it’s all good, but I’m baffled that nothing has worked the first time around for me since I got into this little sleepy town.

(Except a safe [late] flight. Praise God and thank Jesus!)

I also ask for details on where I can get take-out since I’m NOT getting back in the car looking for food in a city with very few street lights where no one knows where anything is located. Well, he told me, most things are closed now [It’s 10:02 p.m. on an effing Friday night]. My options were Chinese, Papa John’s and Dominoes… Sigh.

So all of that typing to say: I’m not country. There’s not a southern bone in my body. There might be a country twang in my voice from my Mississippi roots (please google the great migration if you don’t already know), BUT I’m not particularly kind, I’m not patient and I really just have no tolerance for inefficiency. HOW, dear friends, HOW could I ever live in a city this slow? Well the truth is, I couldn’t.

I thought this thing over (again, too much free time on my hands) and Charlotte crept onto my place I could live list because CHARLOTTE was the first city I ever visited on a work trip. I was in love with the idea of traveling for work at the time and our results in this city were so awesome. I was with one of my best friends (who’s no longer with the company) and we had so much fun. In retrospect, it was probably one of the wackest trips I’ve taken to date, but my vantage point at the time made it a favorite and that’s how I recalled it until just now.

Unfortunately, Charlotte has to come off the places I would live list (with the quickness of a CTA Chicago Card Plus i.e right away). And truth be told it’s not really high up on the places I would visit list anymore either. Oh well.

Tea's Tangents

The word Randomocity is being too widely used and distributed, so I have to jump off of that bandwagon. It wasn't my word to begin with. I probably saw it in a facebook note or two.

Anywho, Randomocity posts are now going to be called Tea's Tangents. And if you haven't figured it out yet, I'm Tea. ;)

Thursday, May 15, 2008

Busiest Person in the World

This was #8 on today's Tangents, but it got out of hand. Deserved it's own post.

8. On that same note, am I the only one with a busy schedule?

I oftentimes find myself at a place that was inconvenient for me to get to/go to in the first place with them asking me if I could come back. I woke up at 6 a.m. this morning to walk to go get my clothes out of the cleaners and these fools, like usual, didn't crease my jeans. So I say something about it and they're like can you leave them here and come back. No! I don't have time to come back. By the time I leave from work tonight, you'll be closed. Friday morning I have a dentist appointment at 7:30 a.m., then I have to leave the office at 2:30 p.m. for a flight, then I won't be back to Chicago late Saturday and you're closed on Sunday. Monday, I will NOT be getting off work on time, so I'll have to get up at the butt crack of dawn again for a crease? No, no sir, I cannot come back, which is why I wish you would've gotten it right the first time. How many times do I have to say, put a crease in my jeans? What's the point of taking them to the cleaners, if they're not creased? I didn't say this to him, I decided it's not really worth it to waste my breath when I'm preturbed. I just rolled my eyes and left.

The same thing happened at the optometrist yesterday. It's in the loop, I don't work over there and in order to go over there I have to waste my entire lunch break (which I don't usually take anyway) to go there. (Meaning if I leave the office for an hour, I'm more than likely going to be there for another hour after closing time to get all my work done). Anywho, I brought some non-working contacts back and made a trade with her. (Mind you, I originally ordered these bad boys in December.) Then I forgot to bring ALL the boxes to give back, I only brought back three and she wants to know when I can come back to bring the others. I know I made a mistake, but I DON'T KNOW when I can come back. I do not have free hours during 9 am to 5pm to do stuff. I HAVE A JOB!

I got off on a bogus tangent, but the point is I must either be the busiest person in the world or other people just don't have anything else to do. The dentist office, the optometrist, the cleaners, the mall, the grocery store. Everywhere I go and ask for something, these fools don't have it (or have it, but did it wrong) and want to know if I can come back at another time so they can correct their problem. No. I carved time out of my schedule to be here right now. I'm not about to be coming in here checking your inventory every damn day. I'm not coming back, so you're either going to have to find what I'm looking for or do what I asked or just tell me no.

Tea's Tangents May 15th, 2008

1. I had a menage a trois this morning. It was me, two chicks and a tall dude smashed together on the bus. I was so disgusted I got off 5 blocks away from my job and just walked the rest of the way.

2. I saw this girl this morning who's flip flops didn't fit and it really bothered me. I know what you're thinking, you're thinking she had on a size 7, when she really needed and 8 or a 9, so her foot was hanging off the back. No family, half of her foot was hanging off of the flip-flop horizontally. I know I'm grossing you out, but I had to deal with it, so I'm sharing my experience. I mean her pinky toe and the one right next to it were basically touching the ground, while the rest of her foot was in the shoe. I don't even know how to fix a problem like that. It ruined my breakfast though.

3. I'm on hold right now with AT&T business services. I happen to have saved the company 7 or 8 hundred dollars on a cell phone bill once, so now I have the glorious task and wonderful privilege of dealing with the cell phones for one of my accounts on a regular basis. Darn my frugal ways. It just said: "Your wait time will be six minutes" FUDGE!!!!


4. I'm now starting to notice what high gas prices have to do with me. Never in my life have I paid so much for groceries. :P

5. I'm growing impatient waiting for the semi-annual sale and am tempted to pay full price.

6. I haven't been in Chicago for 7 straight days since April 22nd.

7. Since I haven't been home, but I cancelled my cable, RCN has been sending me threatening messages about sending their equipment back. I'm NOT paying to ship equipment to them. I'm not free during the week and they're not open on the weekends. I was scratching my head trying to figure out what to do when they called and said they'd send me a free box to send the equipment back. Why in the name of everything that is right in good in the world, didn't they offer that to me a month ago when I cancelled the service. Busters.

Tuesday, May 13, 2008

I'm a line magnet

So I'm at the club with my boy and his boys in Dallas. No one has noticed or made mention of my picnic shoes, I had a drink in hand and the DJ was semi-jammin', so I was feelin' pretty good about myself. I'm dancing and all of a sudden a line of people trying to get from point "A" to point "B" is right around my backside.

I pulled my boy to the side and let him know, "Sorry, I'm a line magnet." It doesn't matter where I stand in the club, people will always flock to me and form a line. Me and thummyb have adapted body language to deal with the problem. We have not completely figured out the reason for this phenomenon, but have theorized that there are two related causes for this line magnet effect:

1) We believe in personal space. People assume that personal space [six inches on all sides homie!] is an open invitation to walk through us. It's not.

2) We're bourgeois and don't like people touching us... hence our belief in personal space.

For your reference, the adapted body language includes:

A) Stop dancing when someone comes by
B) Move slightly when someone comes by, when they pass you get back to dancing
C) Trade spaces with a friend who doesn't believe in personal space to make for a more enjoyable club-going experience
D) Dance on the wall or with a table or corner behind you

Or to avoid the situation altogether you could:

E) Dance in the VIP section
F) Stay at the bar
G) Only go to house parties (we employ this method heavily during Chicago winters)

Back to the story: So my boy noticed my adapted behavior and surmised the reason people flock to me is actually because of adapted behaviors A,B & C. To test his hypothesis, he suggested to keep dancing or dance harder when people come by. I believe in science, so I figured we could try out his experiment. His hypothesis was wrong. It resulted in several different beverages - including beer - spilled on my party shirt and tall men and fat girls stepping on my picnic shoes (and pedicured toes).

I, surprisingly, didn't get an attitude about it. Could be maturity. Could be my representative showing up when she knows she should be around. I dunno.

We tried another hypothesis. Instead of finding a spot to dance in that was previously empty, we went smack dab in the middle of the dance floor. Like in the thick of the sweaty folks, exactly where you DON'T want to be. The line still came through. RIGHT BEHIND ME.

Now that my theories are false and my boy's hypothesis didn't even make it through one night at the club, the last reason I could think of, which is probably the most accurate is that the phenomenon occurs because my butt is flat. People see an opening like a wall and figure that's the best way to go.

Addicted

I'm addicted to my computer. Maybe it's because, unlike radio, TV or even a motion picture film, I schedule MY computer activities as opposed to planning around an already pre-determined schedule. I can read what I want when I want and write ANYthing I want ANYtime I want. I heard (and believe) in the new millenium humans need more stimulation than ever before to be content, but how stimulating can blogging and social networking really be? I'm asking myself. I'm trying to really figure this thing out.

Last night I got home from work at like 8:15 p.m. and I decided I hadn't been home before 9 p.m. in a long time, so I was going to clean house. The kitchen was set because there's NO food in the house and I hadn't been home for 10 days, so how could I possibly have dirty dishes. The living area/bedroom, hallway and bathroom were another story. I had unpacked luggage from 3 trips all over the damn place and it was bothering me. So I unpacked...

I realized I needed to do laundry, but figured I'd just have to buy socks or other underwear, cause my energy was NOT going to allow me to do the "up and down the stairs, wait for the extra slow elevator" routine just for the sake of doing laundry.

So then, I tried to put my new luggage away and remember that I wanted to sell my old, broken luggage on Ebay. My computer was already on. Itunes shuffle was blasting some Erykah Badu, John Legend, Eric Roberson, Outkast mix in the background. Then I SAT DOWN at the computer and the night was over from there. I posted my stuff on Ebay, then I blogged a bit, checked facebook a bit. (The Operation Desert Storm photos, tags and comments just keep rollin' in and I love it.)

Then I was like well, I'm here, I might as well check myspace. I was on myspace for like at least 30 minutes. Y'all KNOW there's nothing to do on myspace for 30 minutes. I think I spent most of the time on my own page dancing to I-N-D-E-P-E-N-D-E-N-T. I looked up and it was 11 p.m. My living room was spotless, but the bed area (it's a studio, be imaginative) was still a wreck and the hallway and bathroom needed tending to.

I was so exhausted at 11 p.m. and disgusted that I'd wasted that much time, so I just went to bed. Here's a list of the other things that were on my to-do list that I did not do: go to the gym, balace my checkbook, buy groceries on peapod, wash clothes, journal, pray, read (I've been working on Audacity of Hope for way too long now).

I guess if one wants to have a relaxing evening she should:
A) Get home way before 8:15 p.m.
B) Have a shorter to-do list
C) Keep the computer off

Yeah, I'm embarrassed to say, but I'm definitely addicted to my computer.

Monday, May 12, 2008

Quote of the Day - May 12, 2007

You know how it goes, this quote is from a long time ago, but I just remembered it.

"I'm sayin' - that bad boy is fitted, but I don't think it's going to fit IT."

-- Kim on why she had to buy a new dress for Operation Desert Storm

Race Relations Funny

So I was sitting in a restaurant discussing the weather with a black friend and two white friends. I was going to repeat a joke by a well known comedian, but for some reason I could not remember his name.

So I say:

Who's the comedian with the perm? And all three of my friends answered at the same time:

CkAaRtRtOwTiTllOPiams

That's right. My black friend said Katt Williams and my white friends were like Carrot Top!

Then between laughs, I looked at my white friends and said, no the other type of perm.

Then me and my black friend were like wait, Carrot Top has a perm? I just thought his hair was curly.

We laughed for two straight minutes on that one. Maybe you had to be there, but it was funny to me.

Sunday, May 11, 2008

A day in the life...

10:30 a.m. - Leave Dallas, TX for event in Waxahachie, TX
12:00 p.m. - Event in Waxahachie, TX
2:01 p.m. - Leave Waxahachie, TX (Dallas airport is 47 minutes away)
2:49 p.m. - Arrive at Shell close to Dallas airport
2:53 p.m. - Arrive at Avis
2:55 p.m. - Walk to bus to American Airlines terminal
3:05 p.m. - Board bus to AA terminal
3:10 p.m. - Arrive at terminal
3:11 p.m. - Get a boarding pass that says flight leaves at 6:00 p.m. (not 4 p.m.)
3:12 p.m. - Stare blankly into the distance
3:13 p.m. - Find out from AA representative that due to traffic delays at O'hare the 4p.m. flight, won't leave until 6:00 p.m.
3:29 p.m. - Go to Friday's to waste time
5:30 p.m. - Board AA flight
6:00 p.m. - Get a notice from the pilot, that we can't leave until 6:10
6:10 p.m. - Get a notice from the pilot, that we can't leave until 6:18
6:11 p.m. - Went to sleep
8:11 p.m. - Get notice from captain, that even though we've touched down, our gate isn't ready.
8:23 p.m. - Get notice from captain, that the gate is ready, but we don't have clearance to drive up to it.
8:32 p.m. - Drive up to the gate, deplane
8:41 p.m. - Wait for checked luggage [I have too many hair products to not check luggage]
9:14 p.m. - Luggage arrives
9:18 p.m. - Stand in cab line
9:40 p.m. - Get in a cab
10:14 p.m. - Arrive home to a chilly studio, open mail, pluck eyebrows, log onto facebook and teaandsuch.com
10:24 p.m. - Put some drafts on teaandsuch.com as a reminder to write about them later
10:40 p.m. - Decide to write this post now before I forget
10:48 p.m. - Post on teaandsuch.com
10:49 p.m. - Go to bed

Good night!

Saturday, May 10, 2008

Today I Learned

Living out of a suitcase just alerted me to exactly how superficial I really am. I'm on my way to the club in Dallas and I didn't bring any party shoes. I was rushing and hadn't really unpacked well from Phoenix. Darnit.

Now I'm on my way out mis-matched and I'm afraid tomorrow some diva is going to have me on her blog like "Look at this girl who had on party jeans with picnic shoes."

Oh, and I almost forgot. I left all of my clutches at home, so I only have my red sack with me. I'm leaving it in the car and going in (gasp) purseless.

Your girl is in Texas all kinds of wrong.

Sigh.

Friday, May 9, 2008

T's Thoughts on Infidelity

You all asked for it and you're probably not gonna like it, BUT... here we go.

Infidelity is dishonest, disgusting and arrogant. It takes a lot of nerve to do the EXACT opposite of what you say you're going to do and then lie about it. Depending on the situation, you are sometimes lying profusely to your significant other and even worse you are probably selling a dream to your mistress (or mister, mistor... I don't know the right word, but ol' boy you're cheating with).

Infidelity=cheating. I'm totally against cheating. Also just to be clear cheating is defined [by me] as having sexual relations of any kind with someone other than your committed partner.

I've never cheated on anyone and I'm never going to. Cheating goes against everything I am: honest [sometimes brutally, which is why you all are reading right now because you never know what I'm going to say]. I digresss, I'm honest, trustworthy and the most loyal friend one can ever have. I mean, if I wasn't so pretty, I could be a dog.

That's just me. I bring the same level of commitment to my romantic relationships that I do to my friendships and familial relationships. So the thought of cheating makes me sick to my stomach. [Oh and I'm not even going to touch of the disease piece, that's a whole 'nother post]. If I decide for whatever reason that I MUST engage in relations with someone other than my partner, rather than to defile a committed relationship, I'm just going to end it. There's no need to bring all that emotional baggage into our lives, nor our bedrooms.

Also, if I find out you're cheating, there's going to be a Waiting to Exhale type of moment. I've yet to find out someone was cheating on me during a relationship. I always have little birdies calling, texting or emailing me after the fact. BLEH

Are you confused yet? If you read this post, you may be thinking how T, how can you have such strong feelings about NOT cheating, but insist that if someone cheated on you in a MARRIAGE, you believe the relationship can be mended?

Well, my feelings on marriage, the ultimate commitment, supercede my feelings on everything else. I'm still not going to cheat on my husband, but I realize that everyone may not have the same integrity and commitment to honesty that I have. My goal is that my spouse will despise dishonesty as much as I do, but if I make a bad judgment call, then that's a bridge I'll have to cross when I get there.

Also, I can hear folks thinking right now, "well what person would tell you they like dishonesty?" Context clues people. Can your significant other call-in sick to work at the drop of a dime? Can he lie to his mother with a straight face? Have you been out with her and she made up a story to get you out of trouble without batting an eyelash? Most people know a liar when they see one, but it also extremely difficult to not attract liars when you're a liar yourself.

Do you cheat? Well, guess what... the person you're with could probably smell your cheating pheromones and was thus attracted to you and now we've got two cheaters who swear up and down the other person is more wrong.

Did I really just waste two paragraphs venting about liars... anyway back to the marriage piece, MY commitment to honesty prevents me from getting a divorce just because my spouse broke HIS vows. If I "honestly" commit to someone in a marriage, I commit for life. Nowhere in the vows does it say "til' death do us part, unless you break any of your commitments to me." No family, it says 'til death do us part. (Re-read that. There's a period after "part," which in my mind means final.)

That's why communication before and during a marriage is SO key. Any man who marries me will need to know that I'm not just going to get up and leave because he's acting up. That's not a pass to act a damn fool [ahem, black sun], that's a fundamental belief that if you want to make something work, you can. A belief that people make ALL kinds of mistakes, but that marriage is the ultimate commitment and can overcome any of those mistakes. Again, my goal is to have a spouse that shares my fundamental beliefs in marriage and who is as committed to the commitment as I will be.

One last point. People give sex and sexual relations WAY too much credit. It is just one part of intimacy. Yes, it's a very important physical and emotional experience, but truth be told most times it's like 8-15 minutes of your life. Sure you spend all day thinking about it, and all of the foreplay leading up to it and depending on if you're in a long distance relationship or not, a helluva lot of time talking about it, but it's over-rated. It doesn't even last as long as a sunburn.

So, IF the only thing holding your marriage together is the fact that your spouse has NOT cheated on you, then yeah, you probably need to get a divorce anyway. (I wouldn't, but I'm saying if that's what you want to do...)

So to sum up this post in T's eyes:
Marriage=forever no matter what
Everything else including infidelity=we can and will work it out

Unnecessary side note: Any man who dates me also knows I'm on the no bull-ish tolerance program. Once someone makes it past my zero tolerance program and still wants to get married [clearly, hasn't happened yet], I'm almost certain, they wouldn't want to make their life a living hell by cheating on me. I mean, ask my exes [you know some of 'em] how hell-ish their lives were after the break-up. Would any person really want to deal with that spirit INSIDE of a marriage? I wouldn't.

Wednesday, May 7, 2008

More on Politics

Had to break this up into two posts. I didn't realize I had that much to say on the topic. Read this first.

Here are some topics that affect people and things around me that I WOULD like candidates to talk about, but that they probably never will.

1. Violence in urban (and even suburban communities). A few weekends ago it was warm in Chicago and 32 people were murdered from Friday night to Sunday morning. What, dear President, are we going to do about that?

Additionally, the amount of women that have been abducted, rape, killed (We miss you sincerely Nailah) and beaten is preposterous. That has not affected me personally, but it could and that falls under violence. I don't EVER hear national politicians talking about keeping local neighborhoods safe. Maybe that's not their responsibility (remember I'm new to caring about politics, so it gets confusing to me what local, state and national govermnent covers), but I think they should at least acknowledge that not all Americans are safe.

2. The unfair judicial system - I'n not open to discussion about this one. The judicial system is biased against minorities AND people with less money. It just is. This affects me indirectly because someone who may have gotten into a little trouble as a teenager could have been a great citizen (and potential husband candidate, truth be told), but they have mandatory sentences for stupid stuff like smoking and/or selling marijuana, which has so many minority and poor men locked up. And once you've been locked up your chances at succeeding as a normal citizen are few and far between. Your job options are rapper and well, rapper.

I actually can't think of any problems that I have right now, personally, that the government could (or should) help me with. I make enough money that I have a monthly disposably income and my health is in good order. I live in a city with a functioning public transportation system and I've never had food poisoning. I'm sitting pretty right now, so I

3. Infrastructure

I actually have heard this on the campaign trail, so my bad for not giving credit where it's due. [to Obama] You all saw that crumbling bridge in Minnesota in the news last year. (I think it was Minnesota). Well everyone was pointing fingers. It's local gvmt, it's state, it's federal. There was even a statement made where someone said "There was nothing wrong with the infrastructure of the bridge. All the checks were in place and up to date."

UM THE BRIDGE COLLAPSED!!! There was CLEARLY something wrong. Even if it passed all inspections, the quote should have been "We don't know what happened, but we'll put new inspections in place to make sure it doesn't happen again."

WTF America? I can't just be on a bridge on the CTA OR in my I-go car and it collapses. That is a BIG effing problem and very few people are talking about it.

So how are you feeling about the issues being discussed during this election? What issues would you like to see more of?

What does that have to do with me?

Many of you who know me personally are used to me asking one rhetorical question about people who get on my nerves.

Usually, it's some sort of "customer service" "professional" who is neither good at working with customers, not professional who has an attitude about his or her position at that company.

i.e. She's about to get off work, so she was mad at me when I came into the airport excited at 5 a.m. (What does that have to do with me?)

He's upset that he drives a CTA bus, so he's mad that I ran to the bus and he had to open the door back up instead of speeding through the yellow light (What does that have to do with me?)

She's mad that she gets off at 11 p.m., but I called at 10:45 and it's taken her 30 minutes to resolve my issue. (What does that have to do with me?)

Yeah, you've guessed it. I'm not very sympathetic to people not doing their jobs correctly or even happily, because I don't have the option to be disgruntled at work. Quit if you don't like it, that's how I feel.

Now that may be an elitist attitude, which brings me to the topic at hand.

This election is baffling to me. Most of the things that are being discussed have nothing to do with me. While I'm an intelligent individual and realize that decisions made now will affect me in the future, I still can't really get next to any of the issues this year.

CLEARLY, I LOVE Barack Obama and volunteer tirelessly for the campaign. I talk to people about his stances on the issues that affect them, but have nothing to do with me. Here are a few of the HOT topics in the news and on the campaign trail and how they have nothing to do with me.

1. Gas prices
- I don't own a car.
- When I drive for work, the company gets the bill.
- When I drive for pleasure, I use I-go cars www.igocars.com and I-go pays for gas.

Now I realize the high cost of gas has affected cab rides (a $1 service fee added to every cab ride in Chicago), plane ticket prices, the cost of food and the cost of other commodities.

However, this does not affect my bottom line the way it does for a majority of Americans who rely heavily on their cars.

2. Healthcare Costs
- I have a job that provides healthcare. If I quit or get fired, they have to offer me the same rates that they get and I'll just pay the rates on my own (instead of it being highly-subsidized the way it is right now). It's a pretty sweet deal.

Again, I realize that should I become termninally ill, by sweet health insurance MAY not cover all the coverage I need, but how can I focus my attention to that cause when it doens't affect me directly right now.

3. National Security
- Of course, this affects me on a larger level, but I happen to believe that everything happens for a reason and if someone's going to attack us (ahem 9/11), there's really nothing we can do about it. Am I going to send letters to elected officials to ask them to further violate me at the airport security checkpoint. Probably not.

I'm going to just send up a prayer everytime my flight takes off and if something tragic happens to me, please know that's what God had in his plans and I love you all dearly. [Sorry to be so morbib, but that's how I feel]

4. Education Costs
- I don't have any kids and I already went to college. They charged me too much and I'm paying it back. My concern is more with the interest rates. If those could continue to come down, that'd be great!

5. The Mortgage Crisis
- I am a RENT-ER. I love it. When I become financially and mentally prepared to purchase a home [June 2009, stay tuned], I'm going to do my research and I doubt I'll be in a foreclosure type of situation. If I am, I don't necessarily think it's the government's job to bail me out. (Note: I haven't been paying as much attention to this as I have to some of the other hot topics, so I can't remember if this is due to loaners being dishonest or people just biting off more than they can chew).

Hello ESP. Goodbye ESP.

So my Ecomonic Stimulus Plan (ESP) came a little early. YAY! I spent it already. Womp.

Here's where I netted out:

12% - Mother's Day Gift
13.5% - Hair products, make-up, cash-back (Gotta love it when you have easy access to a Wal-mart!!!)
65% - R&P's wedding flight
Remaining 9.5% - TBD (Probably spending money)

The positive thing about this is that I don't think I've ever paid cash for a plane ticket. I usually charge it and pay the credit card back immediately or charge it and don't pay it back for a long while. So yes, thank you U.S. Government for helping me to get my credit card debt in order by breaking me off with that ESP. :)

UPDATE: Per my best friend, thummyb, using cash, money orders or even debit for airline tickets is a big no-no.

http://www.moneybluebook.com/always-pay-by-credit-card-to-protect-against-airline-bankruptcy-loss/

"Under the Fair Credit Billing Act (FCBA), credit card consumers who purchase with a Visa, Mastercard, or American Express card are afforded substantially more purchase protections then those who make payment using cash, money orders, or debit cards."

Doesn't He?

C'mon Indiana. It's 49% Obama and 51% Clinton and I'm going to bed. I'm nervous. I just could not believe that we'd spend this much time and money and effort to lose Indiana. The thought is scary. I've never cared so much or been so concerned with politics. Now that I care, it's like my heart is on the line. It's like if Obama doesn't win my heart will be broken and I'll have to get back to my apathetic ways [when it comes to politics].

I don't want that. The world doesn't want that. I'm so nervous folks. Here's something that transpired today that I'll share with you that I think sums up very succintly how the young and inspired feel about Obama and his campaign...

I was talking to a fellow Obama supporter this morning and he looked at me and said "He HAS to win, doesn't he?"

I just looked back and said "He does."

Monday, May 5, 2008

More on Marriage

Hey folks,

I'm chillin' in the Atlanta airport, waiting to get on my flight to Dallas. I figured I'd use this time to catch up on some blog entries that have been sitting in my drafts.

I already told you how I feel about getting married because you're pregnant. (I think it's bananas). So I thought I'd share my general feelings on marriage for anyone who's interested in reading them.

I think marriage is an awesome, sacred life event ordained by God (or whomever you call your higher power). I think two truly become one and after you're married, when God looks at you, he sees your spouse as well.

I think marriage is serious business. Marrying for citizenship, kids, money and even love seems like a bad idea to me. I think marriage is less about being "in love" and more about making a commitment to spend the entire rest of your life with another person. Marriage is less about loving how someone makes you feel and more about being with someone who's values line up with your own.

You've never really made a commitment like the one you make to your spouse to anyone - not even the rest of your family. Maybe you FEEL like you'll be with your parents and/or your kids until the end of time, but you didn't stand before God and everyone you love and pledge that commitment.

I also don't believe in divorce. I don't judge other people for getting divorced, to each it's own, but like Simmore said in Queens of comedy, "you ##%K with me, you stuck with me." The ONLY thing someone could do to make me divorce them would be to physically abuse me or to abuse alcohol or drugs. Truth be told, I believe there's deliverance from these problems as well and if the other party is willing, I'd even stay married after these horrible tragedies have happened.

On that same note I also think the traits that cause someone to be abusive and addictive behaviors are present WAY before these actual actions start, so I'm not saying it's your fault it happened. I'm just saying it's silly to expect someone to change because they got married.

I read articles and hear people talking saying stupid stuff like I got a divorce because: "My wife wasn't the person I feel in love with... my husband didn't treat me the way he used too... I realized that that wasn't the person God wanted me to be with... etc... etc." What's is wrong with people's ability to keep a promise, a vow actually? It's baffling to me.

The [most common] vows say for BETTER or WORSE. I would say that abuse, addiction, money problems, obesity or just plain "not being in love anymore" all fall under the category of WORSE. I think people are very caught up with the idea of marriage and many people have never experienced a successful marriage without divorce, so their idea of marriage is a fairy tale (complete with a platinum wedding).

Also, my last opinion about marriage is that money is WAY more important than love. Look up the statistics. People divorce more about money than ANY other thing. So I'm not saying it's important to marry someone who's rich or wealthy. I'm certainly not saying you should be on some Anna Nicole type stuff either. I'm saying it's important that your money values be similar, if not identical to the person you're marrying.

You're getting ready to become one in the sight of God, the IRS, Transunion, Experian AND Equifax. You need to be with someone who's going to uplift you and not bring you down.
If you want to be wealthy (leaving enough money to sustain two more generations of your family) and you understand the work that goes into it, you may have a problem marrying someone who just wants to be rich (ballin' out of control while they're alive). And the reverse is true as well.

I just want people to be realistic, stop worrying about being lonely outside of a marriage and imagine what it would be like to be lonely in a marriage, before pledging their lives and livelihood to someone who just happens to make them feel good.

Saturday, May 3, 2008

Can I Take Your Order?

So I'm out of town for work and this weekend I'm solo. While I have the budget to eat at fancy restaurants, I really am just excited about the fact that I have a car, which means easy access to fast food.

My workout plan is on hiatus until Mid-march FYI. It's tough to workout when you're traveling. I don't know how I used to do it in '05 and '06.

Anywho, I'm driving and I pass Taco Bell, McDonalds and some southern place I can't recall right now, thinking there's got to be better fast food than this. So I rolled up on a Wendy's. Pure excitement. When I lived in Chicago's suburbs I used to eat Wendy's at least once or twice a week, but there aren't any centrally located in my neighborhood in the city, so I've been missing out.

I pull up to the window and an elderly woman says Welcome to Burger King baby, can I take your order. Re-read that. Yes, I was at Wendy's and the woman said "Welcome to Burger King." Anyone who knows me knows the face I was making at this point. So I look around and it's definitely Wendy's. I say "Is this Burger King or is this Wendy's." So the old chick was like "Oh baby, I'm so sorry. This is Wendy's. How can I help you. The guy in the car in front of me had his window down and this dude looks back at my car and will not stop laughing. I couldn't hardy place my order because I was laughing so hard.

So I get up to the window to get my food and the lady must be taking orders from the back because it's a skinny dude with dreads and a plastic apron on at the window now. He opens the window and say "Baby, I'm so sorry about that it'll be $6.55." I mean he was like a straight up Ricky Smiley character and I was trying to figure out how he could impersonate and old woman with a raspy voice without cracking a smile.

Then it occurred to me. I forgot I was in Atlanta: Land of the free, home of the gays.

This was this dude's REAL voice. I swear, I should have a reality show. My life is hilarious and I couldn't make this stuff up if I tried.

Paint Your Face

Good Morning folks,

Side note: I'm going to have a lot of free time in between events this weekend and during the week, so I'm going to be blogging like crazy. Like my girl Antithesis, tell me what you want me to talk about and I might bless you with a post on a topic of your choice.

Back to the blog.

So I'm at the airport. It's 6a.m. CST and I've been up for about 3 hours. I just had some Mickey D's premium roast, so your girl is good to go. I bought some new luggage yesterday. (Great tips BGG) and my mom got me a new laptop back, so I'm feelin' extra fly and stylish this morning.

Though I went back into my apartment twice before making it down to the cab, I still forgot a VERY important piece of luggage: My make-up bag. Now I have two make-up bags. The all-inclusive and the bare necessities.

Family, I forgot them both. I have lip gloss in my purse and that's it. I don't even have an eyelash curler with me. I'm worried. Now most of you know 5, sometimes 6 days a week, I'm fresh-faced. No make-up at all. I didn't even start wearing make-up until college thanks to my roommate (and best friend) Thummyb, who put me up on all the different (and fly) looks make-up could help you to achieve.

So I'm usually ok M-F, but when cameras are flashing (on the weekends) I need at least some eyeliner to make sure my eyes aren't sunken in and some concealer to ensure tiny acne scars on my face don't make me look like I used to represent the folk.

So I was thinking, do I want to drop a lot of cash to buy all of the same staples I already have at the house OR do I want to be just completely natural all week. I'm not conducting any of the TV interviews, just overseeing them. And even though I'll have to take some photos with clients, they don't know what I usually look like, so I should be good to go.

So I decided I'm going to hit up a Walgreens in Atlanta and buy an Almay extra black eyeliner pencil and that's all I can do. Well... maybe some blue mascare because I heard it makes you look less tired and it's about to be a tiring week.

Check in with me when I get home to see if I broke down to buy the other essentials that were in the bare necessities bag. (Foundation, concealer, light blush and mascara.)

Question for the ladies: Could you go 9 days without make-up?

Friday, May 2, 2008

News You Can Use

Stimulus Payment Schedule for Tax Returns Received and Processed by April 15:

Direct Deposit Payments

Last two digits of your Social Security number (first column) correspond to when your economic stimulus payment deposit should be sent to your bank account:

00 – 20 May 2
21 – 75 May 9
76 – 99 May 16

Paper Check

Last two digits of your Social Security number are (first column) correspond to when your economic stimulus payment deposit should be in the mail by:
00 – 09 May 16
10 – 18 May 23
19 – 25 May 30
26 – 38 June 6
39 – 51 June 13
52 – 63 June 20
64 – 75 June 27
76 – 87 July 4
88 – 99 July 11

So here are some questions for the masses:

1. What are you doing with your economic stimulus funds?
2. What should I do with mine? Here are some options, but boy am indecisive

A) Go on a much-need shopping spree
B) Pay down a credit card (it'll really just be chipping at my credit card debt really, but whatev)
C) Hold as spending money for R&P's wedding in the Bahamas in July
D) Hold as general spending money (the summer is typically rough on my pockets)
E) Use to pay off the rest of my down payment on R&P's wedding hotel (ballin' azzes)
F) Use to buy my plane ticket to R&P's wedding
G) E&F
H)Save (in a regular savings account)
I) Save in a mutual fund
J) Save in a CD
K) Another suggestion you may have

I'm feeling like B & G are my best (and most rewarding) options right now, but I definitely don't want to trick this money off. (Yes, I said trick this money off).

What do y'all think?

Phoenix H.A.M.

When my girls and I - educated, successful, intuitive women - get together we usually discuss important community problems and possible solutions. In order to discuss solutions, we also have to thoroughly assess the problem. While topics usually include decreasing violence, increasing spirituatlity, money, men and marriage, amongst other things, we can apply this problem solving technique to any subject mattter.

Now you had to be there for the full effect, but here's an example:

Dorian: *serious as a heart attack* I'm just trying to figure out what's going on here. Everytime I turn my head I can see her panties and I just don't know what she was thinking putting that on.

Me: *sounding like somebody's mama* See, the problem is, that's not a dress. That's a tunic.

Jenn: Yeah, I think you're supposed to wear leggings with that.

Someone else: Maybe it's a t-shirt.

Someone else: Maybe it's pajamas.

Jenn: *contemplating further* No actually... that's a dress. It might just be the Wal-mart version of it.

Dorian: Not that NO BOUNDARIES version of the original!

Kim and Paris: T, act like you're posing for a picture so we can get a shot of this mess

Me: Ok

See the middle of the photo below for the Phoenix H.A.M. in question. Or as P would say the WTF moment of the night...