Saturday, May 31, 2008

Cleaning House

So you all know it's spring cleaning time and when I get in a cleaning mood, I'm like Mrs. Pinesol or Mr. Clean, I go deep. You saw all those sample travel kits I had to get rid of...

Anyway, have you ever made a decision to clean out your closet and made these kinds of statements to yourself.

1. Why Do I OWN this? - I mean WHAT was I thinking when I purchased this item right here? It doesn't fit, it doesn't flatter me, it's not my style. On the overall it does NOTHING for me.

2. Why do I still have this? It doesn't fit ANYMORE, It doesn't flatter me ANYMORE and it's not my style ANYMORE.

3. Oooh, I forgot all about this. I need to definitely work it into my
weekly/monthly routine.

4. This is SO HOT. I knew I did a good job at the store with this piece.

Well, I recently took a "closet inventory" with people in my life. Some people are useless in the sense that they just take up space in my emotional closet like statement #1. It's not even clear WHY I ever had them in my life in the first place. They don't share my values, my interests, my goals. By circumstance we were called together and like that initial purchase in statement #1 it may have seemed like a good idea to have them around, but it was a bad judgment call on my part.

Some people have just served their purpose. People grow apart and that's ok. These people, like statement #2, are the kinds of people who you go to dinner or coffee with after a long time not seeing them and then realize your paths have become so different that it's a miracle that you're sitting at a table together. I thank God for the blessing these people were in my life and for the new paths he has given to each of us.

Other people are so wonderful and so like me that I realize I don't spend nearly enough time with them (like statement #3). When blessed with the gift of time, I try to cultivate these relationships. Or people who may have been semi-close are getting really closer because our goals, aspirations and ideals line up so beautifully.

Lastly, there are some people who are the exact right choice for me. I cannot get enough of these people in my life and I am so glad that we've found each other and HAVE been able to cultivate the bond that we have. I see them as "classic pieces" in my emotional closet and love them dearly.

Doing an emotional closet inventory is so helpful and freeing. Not only does it free up emotional space, but after you eliminate 1 and 2, it frees up so much time for 3 and 4.

Hope you all have an emotionally clutter free day!


Brown Girl Gumbo said...

Wow, I really enjoyed that!! I loved the comparison of clothes/friendships.

You're righ everyone needs to take inventory and see what you need to "wear" more of and what you need to "toss."

Very great post!!!

antithesis said...

i loved this post as well. i love good analogies. and yes im a strong believer in people entering your life for reason, season, or lifetime. i'm inclined to like people who i am pretty much nothing like because it intrigues me initially. overtime i learn that while i broadened my horizons and learned some things, everyone is not meant to be in your life for extended periods.

ThummyB said...

LOL - I think we can add a few more categories in there...

How about the "Mmmm, this is a good item, but one I can only wear once a season" friends. We definitely have some folks who...I can't say should be completely dropped, but we can keep our interactions few and far between.

There is also the "This is cool, but only in this one setting" friends. Like...'club only' or 'work only' friends.

Anywho...I definitely hope that my #4's stick around for a long long time ;-)

T said...

@ thummyb Great additions.

1. "Mmmm, this is a good item, but one I can only wear once a season" friends." Oh for sure. These are the hurt your feet shoe friends: interactions should indeed, be few are far between.

2. "This is cool, but only in this one setting" friends. Like...'club only' or 'work only' friends. Love this too. These should be the prom & bridesmaids dress friends. Can't throw it away, but it's nice to put on everyone once in a while to remind you of good times.

ThummyB said...

I love it...'hurt your feet shoe friends and prom and bridesmaid dress friends!